i think i finally feel the urge to give a real update.... maybe. okay. we'll try this.
friday: i think i failed the history test i studied so hard for. i felt prepared, but not really prepared for what was on the thing, which KILLS me. i don't know if i've never taken a test like that, where i studied so hard and felt so unconfident. anyway, that's enough of that. at lunch we flung water on each other and got laughed at by crazy people. i was obnoxious and loud. we also bought tickets for the softball game feat LA and lauren for the last hour of school, but it got cancelled so i had a 1.5 hour math class, which i slept through 2/3 of. so when the bell finally rang, i was really crazy tired and out of it for my post-school time that i usually spend kinda crazy with people i know. i was so weird feeling that i forgot to ask for a ride to davis-kidd, and everybody had to be somewhere after school anyway, so i had to walk in the rain. partway there, sallis called and asked what i was doing. he would not put up with me going to davis-kidd alone for friday afternoon, and went to ask his mom if he could come hang out. in a while, he called me back and said that it might be a bit because he had to run errands first, and then i thought he was only going to hang out until like 4 anyway because of picking up his brother, but it turns out that he didn't have to do that. go figure. at any rate, when brock called and asked if he could come hang out at davis-kidd, i thought sallis was going to be a while in coming and i also thought that katherine, whose house is close to there, would be able to come pick up brock and take us to my house for drumming, since sallis can only drive one person. (CHRIST, RUN ON?!) but sallis got there sooner than i'd though, and katherine wasn't allowed to hang out after all. things turned out okay though. i was still really groggy when i got there, so i went and fell asleep on the bench in the YA section. brock called and woke me up to find out where i was, and he came and tickled my stomach with his soft soft fingers. we walked around a little and were looking at supposedly easter-themed picture books when my phone started ringing. i picked it up, and it was sallis... and he was standing like a foot behind us. wahhahaah. i hope he wasn't upset that brock was there; i felt bad that i had fucked up his plans for just the two of us for a bit before meeting back with the group. instead, the three of us walked over to BYB and had some food. alice came after a while, and we split up to drive to robin's house, to pick up the rest of the drums her dad found (!!) but no one was home. that was sort of irritating, since robin said it would be okay for us to come before 6, as long as we called. which we did. twice. at any rate, we went on to my house, and sallis and i listened to le tigre, which was nice. i haven't listened to the whole album in a while. i am getting impatient for a new one though, like woah. at home, alice and sallis each got their first go at hitting the skins. i think sallis will make a very good drummer, and i am excited for him to learn. alice has already learned a few little beats, so we are already on our fucking way. or someone is. after a while, hunter came over to heal them. he said they WEREN'T completely crappy, which was sort of cheering. he said he'd give us some head or something, i can't remember. but my mom had ordered 3 pizzas, so we went and ate those, and forgot about the drums for the rest of the night. it makes me wonder if hunter finished doing whatever he was doing... but whatever. so we ate pizzas, watched a couple bjork videos, very randomly watched the momo's ball tape, looked at SHIT on my computer, sat around, and generally were silly. sallis left at some time because he didn't want to go to this show with us, plus i think he had to be home. around 9 or so, hunter said "my face hurts from smiling and laughing so much!" it was super sweet. i really like him, so i'm glad he's had fun being around with us. at 10:30 we left for the show that started at.... 10:30. it was kind of a bad idea, because we knew that since it was at hi-tone, which is a bar, we should go early to try and get in. but instead we were late. very smart. so yeah, we were turned away at the door. they would'nt even let us come in with x-ed hands. that was really weird, they've done that at all other shows i've seen there. even more weird was the event of walking over to circle k before we left because alice had to use the restroom. inside was none other than mr. brad postlethwaite, who said to me "hello, how are you?" i am positive that he thought i was my sister, whose play he played music for. after he went away, i said to hunter "HE THOUGHT I WAS MY SISTER." and uh, he was still right behind me, and still looking at me according to hunter. i think he was confused, like he could tell there was something a little wrong, but i looked like her and was the same height, so what was the problem? i didn't think until later that i should've been like "brad, pallie! they won't let us into the show because we're underage. give a friend some help." but i didn't even THINK of that. oh well. it wasn't a really big deal to me anyway, plus it would've been $10 and i'm... poor. after that bust, we drove around trying to think of someplace to go since no one for a while. we ended up at republic coffee, but no one really wanted any food/drink, so we left. then we went to peabody park and swang on the swings. for some reason, i got kinda down, but i don't really remember why. i sat in the slide and got wet from the rain. they came to get me when it was time to go, and when i got dropped off i was wet and unhuggable. i think i got online for a little while, but i don't really remember anything. i can't finish this post now, my brain is leaking. i'll be back...

listening to:

christie: hes a cutie
alanna: yeah
alanna: kinda nuts
christie: i cannot believe i said cutie
christie: what the fuck
christie: im 37 years old

last night brandon called at 12:45 and we talked until almost 3. i fell asleep with the phone in my hand. i feel really horrible that whenever he calls, i go into my room and lie on the bed, so i get really really tired and make no sense whatsoever. every time. but even so, talking to him was beautiful, and i love him. by the end of it, though, i think we were both a bit sadder than we'd started out. fucking distance.
i just woke up like an hour ago, and i'm going to keep sitting around for a bit before i do anything. oh wait brock is on the phone apoighpwoihgpoawiehgawhg.

cheese + turkey + wax + carrots mix for brock

if it seems similiar to the cheese + turkey love mix for laylee, that's because this is the same mix, only i replaced the songs brock already knew.

01) Lunachicks - Jerk of all trades
02) Bangs - I Want More
03) the Seconds - burning up
04) The Gossip - Got Body If You Want It
05) The Frumpies - Baby Plays For Pritty
06) Selby Tigers - Droid
07) Sleater-Kinney - Off With Your Head
08) Stereo Total - LA, CA, USA
09) Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci - Poodle Rockin’
10) James Kochalka - Monkey Vs. Robot
11) Tullycraft - Pop Songs Your New Boyfriend’s Too Stupid To Know About
12) Jimmy Eat World - The Authority Song
13) Against Me! - we laugh at danger (and break all the rules)
14) Ima Robot - Alive
15) The Slits - shoplifting
16) Semiautomatic - Resident Genius
17) Peaches - Set It Off
18) Deerhoof - Milking
19) Tracy + the Plastics - Hey Rubella
20) The Casual Dots - Clock
21) Xiu Xiu - Clowne Towne
22) Amps For Christ - Enids Rant
23) Kristin Hersh - The Key
24) Devendra Banhart - Nino Rojo
25) Lakuna - Lemongrass
26) Apples in Stereo - Glowworm
27) Death Cab For Cutie - The Sound of Settling
28) Throwing Muses - Shark
29) Talking Heads - Pulled Up

listening to: alex lloyd - black the sun

does this movie look amazing or what?

i love late nights. wooka.

what a fucking nuts day.

i'm not tired because i've consumed so much grease/sugar/coffee. after blogging earlier today, i met up with margaret and katherine at starbucks around 6:30 to study for this massive history review test we have tomorrow. i'm really glad we did that because i study SO badly on my own. katherine and i were there till closing time at 11, and margaret had left only half an hour or so before that. it was crazy studying like woah. we got a LOT done, and talked only a minimal amount, but what we did say was great. i love talking to margaret. we discussed what a great mom she'd be, and we talked about parents, and about college, and people, and it was just all in a very good way. maybe because of the spring and the wind and the nice everything. i still have all my regular homework to do, and still fucking chemistry make-up work that i've been avoiding. gahhhh. i failed that test today.
brandon brandon puppy love, i'm so sorry i missed your call AGAIN. we were at starbucks and the phone was in my bag, and i wouldn't have been able to talk anyway. but margaret really enjoyed listening to the message. she thought your voice was great.
CRAZY UNTIRED ALANNA HAD 2.3 COFFEES AT STARBUCKS. PLUS WATER. AND A CRACKER. AOWIGHPAOWGHPOWAHGPOHAWPOGHPWOAIEH.

listening to: got rice, bitch?

every day this week, i've missed calls from brandon on my cell phone. i feel very bad about that, and love, i'm sorry. one of the times, he called at 9:08 and i turned on my phone and got his message at 9:10. it was sad stuff, but i had too much work to call him back. maybe tonight will be the charm of the week. i'm rambling, and okay.

this week is full of spring, and i love it. alice, brock, and i went to ck's after school and had milkshakes and grease. i rubbed all over alice's soft-ass arm, and brock rubbed all over mine. it was very nice. nobody rubs me but laylee, so that in itself was exciting.
I'M A MEATBALL I'M A MEATBALL

a good afternoon! i'll come back later.

DRUM FUND IS OVER

after school and BYB club, katherine and i headed over to robin's pad to pick up/pay for our new (for us, at least) set of DRUMS. the whole thing was in a wheelbarrow in her backyard next to pink flamingoes, daffodils, and a long-neglected pool. robin's dad showed us basically how to set them up. he was a really cool guy, and kept saying what crappy drums they were. we got our snare, tom, bass, sticks, cymbals, and infinite amount of stands into katherine's hotass honda, and presented the contract we had written only minutes before. mr. goodwin considered the proposition, and rejected it. $40 was too much for these drums, apparently. it turns out that the snare was the only thing decent in the whole kit, and was the only thing he even wanted to make us pay for. but for some reason (embarassment?) he GAVE THEM ALL AWAY! we were ecstatic. so ecstatic that i attempted to drum on the glove compartment to alice's mix allll the way home. we set up the drums in the comics/futon/blue/Alan's Writing Room and tried to mess around for a while. but, as sleater-kinney would remind us, "good things never wanna stay," and we had to study for history. we called brock and of course, he had to drum for a bit as soon as he got over here. we tried to watch these american revolution tapes, but nearly fell asleep. even though the little old man was super hot. we then took turns reading aloud from the study guide, but such a group as ours is easily distracted, so we got very little accomplished. so little that i really don't need to be blogging right now, because i should be studying still. pictures to come when the server revives... listening to: swans - big strong boss

TODAY SUCKED.

ONE AND A HALF HOURS OF SLEEP, MAYBE. I'M TRYING TO FORGET. NO MORE QUESTIONS.
good things:
-february and the winter months are dead and gone.
-though it rained all night, the day was beautiful and sunny.
-we had a jumping contest after school, which brock obviously won, his little head hitting the blue painted sky. but he LIFTED ME so that i would win! he LIFTED ME like a real lift! ohhhhh my.
-tomorrow is dr. seuss and eileen's birthday.
-morgan read "horton hears a hoo" aloud to us in the car
-i got a sonic reese's blast, and i'm enjoying myself.
-i got my amazon packages that weren't supposed to come until march 11, and that makes me happy.
-this week feels like a relief, even though i can tell it won't be.
-WE ARE BUYING DRUMS FOR $45 FROM ROBIN'S DAD. HOLY SHIT.

listening to: dirty power - hate my way (throwing muses cover)

the server is acting up right now, but when it comes back you should be able to check out pictures from friday's PONO NITE and last night with brittany. but for now, i've got too much work (and brandon) to be able to blog right. so you have to wait.

if everyone could please listen to "the key" by kristin hersh, it would be very much appreciated because i want to make a video for it. so if you could think about images and ideas and whatever comes into your head when you listen to it, and give me suggies, it would be very much appreciated.

listening to: pixies - subbacultcha

Barefoot- free, rebellious, and wild, you hate
boundries and rules. You tend to be on the
crazy side and often sweep people up along with
you. You are most likely the leader of your
group of friends.
What Kind of Shoe Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


last night i had an adventure with a bottle of lemonade... thank you, brett hanover.

i think you forgot that we should be friends
i think you forgot to call me again
today/night sucks and i want to die. i'm thinking of running around in the cold outside with a camera... probably not.

listening to: 7 year bitch - the midst

anyone up for ditching this dump? with me?

many of you already know that i was not in attendance at white station today. unfortunately for me, i missed the pan-african program, and my damned oral presentation in history. this morning at about 4:15am, i was gladly starting on my last article for the engilsh project. i can't remember why, but i opened up the last one i had done, and it was ... gone. of course. not in the sense of "hello, i am the devil computer, and i just ate your damn file. sorry?" but "hello i am the text file and i am only one paragraph now." i nearly died. i looked through all the recent files and all the auto-saved stuff to see if it would resurface, but to no avail. i decided there was no way that at 4:30 i could redo that essay and finish the others. first i thought i'd just finish everything else, and just be missing an article. i decided to start printing out my history stuff in the mean time, and surprise! when i opened it, my outline was there but everything else was gone. i sat there for a minute, and then went the fuck to bed. about an hour and 15 minutes later, mom was waking us up for school. i could barely move i was so tired, but i managed to get out of bed and show her my dead files. she let me stay home to work on them, but i went back to bed because i could barely stand. guess when alanna wakes up? 2:45pm, when her cell phone starts ringing. fuck fuck. i am too afraid to open any of my other files, because i'm afraid they'll all be gone. i haven't gotten anything done and i want to die. awoeihpaoeghopwahgpiwhoe

two more articles!
one more essay!
oral presentation to tweak!
MASS AMOUNTS OF PRINTING!
EXODUS!!!

i want everyone to listen to "the key" by kristin hersh RIGHT NOW with no exceptions because it's the most beautiful song in the world ever, and it never fails to make me a little bit happy. i want to do a video to that song, if i can think of anything good enough...
YES, I'M WORKING!

GOAL: 1 hour of sleep tonight
MET: 30 minutes of accidental nappage
CURRENT CONDITION: near dead, and attempting to sustain myself with gross slimfast product

my stomach is full of waffle finally, and my head is full of sleep, and my hands are full of type type type. this is bad bad bad. i want to be beds.

i've been looking at all these pictures of the gay marriages going on, and i'm crying again.
see for yourself.
some of you have heard this story, but i want to tell it so that i'll remember it for myself later. the other night i stayed up really late doing homework, and i walked into the kitchen where i found this rainbow "THANK YOU" note. it was from our lesbian neighbors karen and lois, who recently adopted a baby boy from russia. mom had given them some books for him, hence the note. the first paragraph was your standard "we love the books!" response, but the second was something about "thank you so much for supporting us... we're so glad to have friends like you who understand" etc. it being very late, i couldn't get it through my head that there should be anything wrong with what they are and how they live... i knew that there were things up against them, but at 2am i really couldn't understand why. i got very upset.
and now i'm looking at these pictures, which are so beautifully happy and at the same time really upsetting. i don't know.

listening to: frou frou - track 3(?)

AAGHHHHH!!! WHY!!!?!????
the pro bono video looks awful. let's all hope i forget to bring it to school tomorrow.

AHHHH I JUST GOT MY "DEATH TO THE PIXIES, WE'RE BETTER" PIXIES COVERS ALBUM, BURNED SPECIFICALLY FOR ME AND SENT ALL THE WAY FROM HOLLAND BY ZEA, A BAND ON THE ALBUM. WOOOWOWHIOEHEA.

listening to: pixels - gigamuffin (pixies tribute)

OH GOD I CRAVE A WAFFLE. WHERE IS MY WAFFLE?

school was yick today. therapy went surprisingly well, though. i am starving, but in a good mood.

i saw "red paint" again tonight, and i thought it went quite well. bravo to the cast... especially morgan and william. bitches. you're hott.

friday: so i ended up applying to 5 AP classes. i obviously don't plan to take all of them. but yeah. it's crazy. anyway. after school, mom picked me up so that we could go get my permit. but she was a little late, and that place was crowded as hell. i didn't feel like i'd studied enough that i was confident i'd pass. and what's the point of being at that damned place forever if you're going to have to come back very soon? so we left, and i came home. i sat around for a while, and napped in morgan's bed until like 5:30. i'd been waiting to hear from some people about doing the pro bono video, and we finally made plans to meet at audoban park, although it was way too dark to film anything. dad drove me there after he took morgan to theatreworks, but we drove around for half an hour and could NOT find my damn friends. at this point, i was sure that the night was going to be horrible but it got a lot better. evenutally i met up with alice, LA, and allison at ck's where i had some grilled cheese and nice. by that time, i'd heard that poor brock was in a small wreck although when i called, he was still there and couldn't talk.
the four of us went to super target and tried on bras, which was super fun only that it's impossible to find something that fits. where is laylee? where is my bra-shopping with laylee day? at any rate, we ran around super target and got icees. then somehow we got horribly lost and ended up in fucking eads. some woman in the car next to us, at the end of walnut grove, tried to hit on us. we got to shelby farms, but were terrified and left for galloway gardens to lay on the golf course. we rolled down a hill about 203597 times before laying out a blanket to cuddle on. alice, LA, and i were very snuggly but allison was ... not. i don't think she had fun at ALL that night, and she kept trying to go home. it was bad, and i don't think she wants to hang out with us again. plus she kind of killed the mood, but i tried not to pay attention to it. at home, eileen was spending the night. we tried to watch "lost in translation" but we all fell asleep on the couch.
saturday: i woke up, and talked to mom for a while. she is really good to talk to, and i should start doing that more. i never talked to katherine, so we didn't get to go drum shopping yet. which is upsetting, but i think we're going to ask robin about her dad's old set this week. woo! at any rate. i can't really remember what happened during the day, except for seeing morgan and eileen a bit. i cleaned, and at 3, alice, LA, and brock came to pick me up. we grabbed the camera and high-tailed it over to overton park where we filmed the pro bono video. we had a lot of ideas, but only ended up doing one of them -- the one that no one is going to pay attention to on the announcements. oh well, we can do some more maybe. it took us forever to do just this little 30 second video, so knows. when we finished, we were STARVING so we went to wendy's. sallis called me, and i'm sad that i couldn't see him at all this weekend. baby love, forgive me... anyway, i got home around 6:15. morgan, eileen, and amelia were cuddling on the sofa watching "blue citrus hearts" and mom and dad were getting ready to go out to eat. this was bad. i had to clean my room, and then i'd be alone at home with no ride to becca's for our super sleepover night of death. i was upset. i talked to sallis on the phone for a while as i cleaned, but i don't think he's big on phones and he didn't stick around. then i switched off talking to laylee and becca for forever. finally, kevin said he'd pick us up, which i felt horrible about. the boy is a sweet sweet thing. laylee and i got to becca's around 10, where we watched "the cell" on becca's lovely green couch and talked all night. it's really crazy thinking that in all the time we've known each other, the three of us have never hung out alone... i wish we'd done it before now. i had a nice time, though.
sunday: so i'm apparently a massive cover hog. i slept in the middle of becca's futon and caused damage to the population of the world. we woke up at 11am, and laylee had to leave pretty much right away. that was sad. becca and i had breakfast, which was toast and hot chocolate from powder that william made himself. we talked to becca's mom, which i really enjoyed. then my mom came to pick me up. and that's about all. i'm avoiding homework. alack alack.

TO BED AT 3! NO AP FOR ME!

one thing about me staying up to finish work-- no matter how late it is, after i finish brushing my teeth, i MUST clean something in the surrounding bathroom area. it never fails.

CREEPY NOISES OUTSIDE. AWEIHAOPGIHEOPHIOPAWEHII.

MAKE ALANNA'S 2004-05 SCHEDULE!!

this is my new contest.
what classes do i take next year?!
YOU decide!
(but do it quickly because my AP apps are due tomorrow...)

japanese 1
ap psychology
ap latin
ap english
honors english
ap statistics
honors pre-cal
honors physics ("the most poetic of the sciences" according to my mother)


pick five!
prove you love me!

well, mom forgot about taking me to the dmv today. so i'm still over 6 months away from the world of driving.
at any rate, today was a lot better than i thought it'd be. even though i stayed up until 2am finishing my homework that i didn't start until 11pm, i was not tired at all today, except for about 20 minutes in 7th period. i think today was just so good because of yesterday's afternoon/evening of NICE THINGS, and of course the beeeeautiful weather. we sat outside on the "grass" for lunch. it was so nice.
after school, alice, brock, and i went to backyard burger. this has become a weekly ritual, apparently. and i like it very much. those kids are very good post-school talkers, and i lub em. i wish i could do nice things every day... life would just be a lot better. i believe that wholeheartedly, too. bitches.
i got to davis-kidd around 4, and by 5 i still hadn't been picked up. i was really nervous that my mom had already come and i hadn't been there, and that i was being left to rot and die. i tried to work on as much homework as i could in the meantime, though. who should show up while i was gazing horrifically at an AP psychology application, but the dear sir sallis! even though he was only there for a few minutes, and during most of that time i was borrowing his cell phone, it was quite good to see him. i love the boy, and i really wish i got to see him more often.
so, mom was simply running late, due to a detour in spain, and eventually picked me up at like 5:30. she bought a milk chocolate with caramel bar for me and morgan as an apology. it was a damn good apology. we each had a piece and sat in pure silence for two whole minutes, just savoring that damn chocolate. it was a beautiful moment. my family-- lovers of chocolate, if nothing else.

listening to: the simpsons

i'm going to try and take my driving permit test thing tomorrow, with a very low knowledge level. everyone wish me luck! aya!

brock called to ask me a question about math homework. so obviously, we stayed on the phone for four hours. and we only stopped because his phone died. holy christ, i love the boy.

we're no longer winning any drums on ebay. this pleases me.
catching up quickly... monday was a half-day. we didn't do anything because you really can't on a half day. afterwards, i went to lunch at rafferty's with sallis, brock, and alice. i love those kids... then we came to my house, where morgan, eileen, and foot were hiding. we watched a few music videos and things before katherine came to meet us. we rerecorded the "hamster lovin" song because in the old version, we were all really tired, and inappropriate laughter in the middle. sallis also added a hamster rap bridge. ooh excitement. after sallis and eileen left, and morgan and foot went off to explore math homework, the concept of the day finally came around. basically, "band practice" consisted of bidding on drumsets on ebay. katherine, alice, and brock thought up a nice concept for a song though, which we recorded so that no one would forget it. after katherine and alice left, brock and i hung out for a little while before heading over to his house where he ate and his family further deepened their suspicions that i'm anorexic. then we drove over to eudora churchy and sat with hunter to enjoy the music of memphis youth symphony. katherine and alice were lovely! bravo bravo! the concert ended somewhat late, but i was a bad girl and stayed talking longer than i should've. dad called and asked if they could come get me, and i said to pick me up at brock's because we were just leaving. none of us had realized that it was 10. mom had to pick me up, and she was sick. i don't know why dad didn't do it. we got caught by a train and some old people and didn't get home until 10:45. i felt really horrible, and shut up in the bathroom for a while. you know how that is. bathrooms are my depressed place, if you were not aware. anyway. i went to bed pretty much without doing any homework.
this was supposed to be a quick update. fuck's sake.
tuesday was shit. i don't want to go into that at all. the end.
today was worse shit. it all carried over from the increasingly horrible last night, and today i faked happy, which made it worse. telling you guys that i was faking it is a definitely bad idea. because it defeats the purpose. but hahaha i don't care because i'm saying it for me, and not you. anyway. it was awful. so awful, that because i was in a horrible mood after 6th period, becca invited me over to her house for post-school happy time. kevin and laylee took us to her house, and on the way we ate kevin's 34-day old pizza that had been cooking in the back of his car. we had a bit, until becca threw that shit out the window. oh how pepperonis fly. we got to becca's, grabbed the dog, and hopped along to the gas station for a chex mix/cheetos/dr pepper run where we offended some grumpy middle-aged woman by trying to double park. talking to becca is great. she is an amazing listener, talker, and confidence-installer. plus that bitch is hysterical. we hung out until 5:30, and i had a wonderful wonderful time... i hope she did too. i am excited about our saturday night night with layleekins. ewaohgpohiwe the phone is ringing, hang on kids.

listening to: the news

i want to die.

katherine, the scandaliz vandalistz, and i are currently bidding on four different drum sets on ebay. now that it's happening, i don't want us to win anything just because the shipping will be more expensive than we calculated, and the drums will not be what we thought, and anyway hunter said it's easy to make a cheap drumset just going to yardsales, and i'm worried that we might accidentally win TWO kits, and god damn it. the porch ghouls' entire drumset is a suitcase with a tambourine on it. come the fuck on. how much can we ask for?

puppy, put the skirt on. make me forget who i thought you were (the hip cat of my nightmares) until you devotedly scratched at my door, and every day for two months, howled to the shell of me. trickster, love bites dissolved my chains between your teeth, you melted ice with sugar.

puppy, take the skirt off in my dreams: become my faithful lump. you're a regular visitor in my head these days-- again you stalk in, look around, find a nice clean spot and settle down, shed all over the fucking carpet. how am i supposed to keep this place up, since now you wanna be my dog?

come home, puppy

i feed you under the table straight from my hand, your tongue greasing my palm in its search for the difference between me and the salt. after dinner, you present me with collar and leash, begging night's adventures. when we crawl back in through the broken window, we

come home puppies wet with rain and reeking of grass. so what if we spent all night chasing after cars, sniffing lamp posts, waiting for a bus that never came? we curl up at the foot of the matress and gently whimper into sleep as the moon turns into sugar.

yikes. i'm in trouble.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LA!

i attempted to meet up with my english group at 2pm at the library. i couldn't find them for like 10 minutes. it sucked. finally, i caught becky in the cafe. i ordered a caffe mocha. mmm. i tipped the guy because he was nice and cute. we worked way too hard on that dinky-ass project. i was irritated that i had to miss yogurt. brock picked me up when we finished working, and we drove around on a wild search for coffee. i love that damn boy. we listened to 5 6 7 8's and sleater-kinney. he needs new cds though. nothing in the car really fit the mood. we stopped at java and laughed at our old life. the photographs weren't that bad, actually. i'm a sucker for amazing colors. we were driving down cooper singing (he was corin and i was carrie) when we noticed that william and becca were in the other lane, with daniell trailing behind. we followed them to the parking lot of media co-op where we talked for a few minutes. i hope we weren't too annoying. i think i was being really obnoxious. brock and i finally found coffee at ... starbucks. ahha. there were no seats so we had to sit in his car in the parking lot and drink our caffe mochas. guys, i've now had FOUR caffe mochas in THREE days. this is getting sick. brock drove me home and he reviewed my latest mix. i am worried that alice won't like it, and i was annoyed with myself for repeating songs that brock put on her mix. i don't know why i didn't ask him. oh i remember why. it was damn 11pm when i made it. oh well. it was a very nice day. sallis called, and i love him. he sent me a carnation. i don't know if i said that, but i should have. he is the sweetest thing.

listening to: ima robot - alive

band practice is cancelled. that is sad. except that it's just postponed till tomorrow. hooray!!! does anyone want to drum for SV? anybody have some drums they don't need? god damn.
i have to go to the library and do a stupid project. gag gag gag. i hate waxy wexy.

.the first paragraph is rated G for gross and graphic. tonight i discovered that when i squish my face over to the left, the skin on my nose moves in a weird way and my cartilage pops out of my fucking face. it's only the one side, too. the other one just does what everyone elses does. but the right nostril's skin just does not want to stay over the bone part or something. it's DISGUSTING and TERRIFYING but highly unnoticable. i showed my mom, brock, and katherine, but only katherine screamed and saw it for its true self. the other two were too blind to see anything weird about it.
on the asides, the weekend is going well. yesterday's planned party didn't work out the way we'd hoped. after school, katherine and i came here to edit, and we got a lot done, i thought. before she left, i got my mom to talk to her about the dilemmna of deciding whether to go to music camp and have a better chance of getting accepted at oberlin, or going to au pair in morocco for the chance of a lifetime. mom is very helpful, and pretty soon both the parents, plus me and eileen were sitting there helping katherine decide her future. it was crazy, and i hope it helped. as she was leaving, brock arrived. we sat him down in the interrogation chair and tried to help him make life-changing decisions, but i don't think we had as much impact. soon, alice and LA arrived, and we stood around for a while before going to see the play, which was much better than i expected. morgan and william were the best. they were adorable. paul and morgan make cute siblings, also. there were a lot of people at the play... amelia, eileen, mouse, me, brock, alice, and LA all sat in the front row, and becca, christine, stephanie, and katherine sat in the back. i was sad that we couldn't sit together, but it was kind of nice that it meant there enough other people in the audience for that to be a problem. big morgan and amber gave me hugs. i kind of miss seeing them every week at open-mic. i won't go on and on about the play, because i know some of you are expecting to see it tomorrow night or next weekend. support our own voice!
after the play, we stood around talking for about a million and one years. some of it was nice, but i didn't like being at the theatre for so fucking long. i had a large group of friends there, though, and it's hard to get that many people at once to listen to you and make plans and things. it took us forever just to move out to the lobby, then another forever to move outside, and another forever to move to the sidewalk. it was really painful, because i was EXTREMELY hyper and restless. i can't tell if it's the restless that makes me hyper or vice versa, or if it's just situational entirely. anyway, we decided to go to gibson's. becca had to ride with christine to show her where to go, and didn't want william to be alone, so i rode with him. even though we took a wrong turn, and had to stop at my house for me to get some money, we got to gibson's before anyone else. on the way, we made wild noises, wrote an opera, and staged a musical. horse lips woman at the red light was not amused. we only got to be at gibson's for a very short amount of time because by now it was almost 11, and that's when practically everyone had to be home. i really wish we hadn't taken so damn long getting out of the theatre. oh well. i was sad that we had to break up so quickly, and i also felt bad that william had just driven me from midtown to east memphis and then had to drive me BACK to midtown, and back to east memphis with becca. williammm thank you. will you be my crazy whale heart? we listened to loud peaches and selby tigers, and danced like wild cats of love. suddenly becca asked if they HAD to take me home and i was like "fuck no!" it made me really happy, and we drove and drove and drove and danced danced danced revolutions. a scary hispanic man tried to hail us down with his silver car, flashy cell phone, filthy money, and cat calls, but we were not sucked in. we drove all the way to arkansas and deep into its abyss before we lost that stupid guy and came back to memphia. the river was lovely, and reeked in the light of the bridge. we put our faces to the wind and blew back the air we caught. it was a nice little night, as a whole, and i came home incredibly hyper. in some ways, i don't like coming home wound up because then there's nothing for me to do here to fix that, but it's still better than coming home wound down. that would mean that i didn't enjoy myself enough to keep it up or something. i don't know. anyway, i got here just as morgan, amelia, and eileen were going to bed. i was hyper, as stated, and injured myself on something in morgan's room while attempting to sing and dance jimmy eat world. my foot is now very bruised and it hurts to walk on it. (one reason i'm still sitting in here.) amelia and eileen wanted me to cuddle in the bed, and so i did. morgan fell asleep but the rest of us stayed up and talked for a while. i told them about my obsession with backs, which led to the day's main event. after valentine's day breakfast this morning, which was pastries and mousse-y chocolate thingies from la baguette, eileen, morgan, amelia, and i took turns taking pictures of each other's backs. we also drew on each other's backs with smelly markers and it was too much fun. i love backs. there are some of them posted right now, i still have to decide if any more are suitable for the internet. some of them, though lovely as back photos, could be misinterpretted somewhat. and katherine will testify to that. some of the ones i posted might not even be so great. after eileen and amelia left, i showered, played around with the pictures, called brock, and just hung out for a while before katherine came over at around 6 or so to edit. it took us a while, but we editted one scene (maybe it could count as two, though) and it looks really good. after that, we sort of lost the drive and sat on the couch. mom, dad, and morgan were all away at the play. brock had decided not to come over like he'd planned, and we were sad. we decided to call him and serenade him with our lovely song "brock, come over. we are really bored. brock, come over. we wanna get it on." unfortunately, his mother picked up. he was not at home. we were heart-broken. so we set out to find him at davis-kidd. we were so surprised that he was actually there, we had to sneak up on him. we stood there behind him for a little while, and he didn't notice until katherine started laughing. then he thought we were laughing at him, i think, and he seemed really sad. but when we realized we had come to visit him, he was happy and we had a lovely night chatting it up at the d-k bar. i got my second caffe mocha in two days, which is a little sick. this one didn't have red sprinkles though. i love those kids. we talk about everything, and i love it. the woman working at bronte was even amused. we left, having realized we'd always wanted to drive down flicker street, that little road the veers off from the ramp that goes from union to poplar, by my house. so we drove to my house, where first brock pissed in my backyard (i forgot my key) and then we all piled in his car and screamed down FLICKER ST AHHHHH and flicked everything off. there were no people and it was pretty crazy. every single thing on it looked like a movie. we also had a lot of great ideas for our new movie tonight, and we got really excited. flicker street just turns into central at the end, next to that tobey park thing. the best part about the end of the road is the billboard there. it's the lowest billboard i've ever seen. we decided to film part of the movie on it. it will be brilliant. katherine and i helped brock climb onto it and he danced around in the rain, in front of this huge, disgustingly yellow 'charmed' ad. i love the boy. i can't wait to film the movie there. ahhhh i can't spoil too much about the plot yet. i'm not saying a word. AT ANY RATE. after that, we drove back to my house because katherine had to be home. we all hugged and brock was a fuzzy lumberback named carl and katherine was an old movie star goddess. brock came inside, where we warmed up a stick of garlic bread and split it. we sat on the couches with mom and she told us crazy stories about hers and my relatives. it was very great, because mom is a wonderful storyteller and my family will never cease to amaze me. the best stories were the ones about people dying in ways that made mom laugh. you people don't want to know the kind of people i'm related to. it's sick, truly. at 10:45 brock had to go back home and he hugged me like three times at the door. it was very sweet. he pissed in my backyard. ahahahahhahaa. at any rate. valentine's day was a success in that i met the beautiful backs of several people, and decided i should photograph backs on a regular basis. although i forgot to ask katherine and brock if i could do theirs. fuck. already, my plan is failing.
after brock left, mom was getting worried about when morgan was going to come home so i was instructed to figure it out. i called becca to ask if she had the number of the place where the cast party was, but she didn't know. but william was bringing morgan home at that very moment, so all was well, and becca and i got to talk on the phone for a while. i wish i got to talk to her more often, but she is a busy bumblebee. i hope she realizes that she can always call me when she's bored. and the same goes to all you bitches. am i going to get to the sad state of posting my phone number on the internet so that i will have more going on?! christ almighty.
zoe invited me to her advice blog. wootie woot i'm now an advice-er. i don't know how good i am at advice hahahaah. not very good. but i'm better than brittany's -- "YOUR NEIGHBOR HAS THE HOTS FOR YOU" or whatever. ahah shit. brittany went to bed a little while ago. we had our first hyperactive online conversation in forever. i forget how insane we always made each other. next weekend, i want her to come to "red paint" with me, and maybe spend the night. i think that would be nice. and maybe she could meet some of my friends. i would like that, anyway. i don't want her to be some crazy far-away anymore. i miss our stupid.
tomorrow was supposed to be my first day of yogurt, because i'm "on punishment" and apparently that means yoga with sophie. *shudder* but there's a SCANDALIZ VANDALISTZ rehearsal that brock and i must attend, because are now part of the band. AHHHHHHH!!!!! how good is life? i've always wanted a band. it's a shame i can't sing. but there's nothing else i can do either. maybe they'll just let me stand in the back and play air guitar. i'd still hit the wrong notes, and get booed off the stage. oh well. at any rate, we're going. we also plan to buy an $80 drum set off ebay, even if it doesn't have any cymbals. we're desperate, okay?! if you can think of something better, fucking call me before we do it. the bidding ends in like 20 hours so do it soon. bitches.

listening to: essential logic - pedigree charm
(this post was written in between 11pm and 3am. oh how i suck.)

feathers to sink a ship

a mix for alice

01) the raveonettes - cops on our tail
02) atom and his package - i am downright amazed at what i can destroy with just a hammer
03) pixies - vamos
04) sleater-kinney - little mouth
05) yeah yeah yeahs - miles away
06) essential logic - aerosol burns
07) lunachicks - babysitters on acid
08) veruca salt - volcano girls
09) andrew bird's bowl of fire - T'N'T
10) death cab for cutie - the sound of settling
11) apples in stereo - glowworm
12) pain - thimbledrome
13) bonfire madigan - smoke signals from the burnpile
14) our lady peace - potato girl
15) cornelius - drop
16) elastica - stutter
17) bikini kill - rah! rah! replica
18) myshkin - apricot tree
19) garrison starr - grounded
20) spiritualized - i didn't mean to hurt you
21) polaris - saturnine
22) throwing muses - cowbirds
23) ani difranco - bliss like this
24) de la soul - tread water


i think i have a lot more loud girls than i intended. sorry, alice. you know how i like em.

oh christ i love girl scout cookies.

the people at the backyard burger by school are entirely too nice. i'd left my purse at home today, so when me, brock, and alice went by after school i couldn't buy anything. the nice woman (natalie) who was working there felt sorry for me, and slipped me a cup to get myself a drink. later, she brought me a large fries. before i'd even finished those, she brought me a burger and a hug. when she was getting off her shift, she came over to say goodbye and give me another hug. she was the sweetest little black lady i've ever met. she called me "special." she called brock "booboo." it was a weird experience, but it's nice to know that there are such kind-hearted spirits milling around fast food joints. have sweet dreams, loves. i'm sorry i'm been blogging so erratically.

THIS POST WANTS SOME DETAILED ADDED, BUT THE MAIN OUTLINE IS THERE.

WHAT I'M DOING-
tuesday: some time after i last blogged, i IMed elise with the intention of maybe giving her some constructive criticism. she's been coming up in conversation a whole lot lately, and it's getting more and more negative. it's sad thinking that anyone should have to be talked about like that by so many people, and i was worried that her life will just be that pattern forever if she never realizes it. i thought i could maybe give her a heads-up of sorts. (next day, kevin tells me that she completely misunderstood what i said and she is very mad.)
wednesday: went to backyard burger after school with alice and brock until 4:30. brock dropped me off at davis-kidd right as mom was getting there. i came home, did a little homework, and raced the clock to make plans with becca. she got sick, but we still managed to get to ted's show. we had to have kevin give us a ride there, which i felt HORRIBLE doing, because he wasn't going to stay. especially since he came to my house expecting to pick up both of us, because i hadn't clarified that she was at her own home. so we had to go all the way back to east memphis to get her, and then all the way back to midtown again. the car conversation was nothing short of insane. we got there at about 8:20, but apparently only missed about three minutes of the show. they played for about another five-- it was mostly feedback and pure nothing noise. the band had had whiskey, and forgotten all the songs. the other two bands didn't show up. it was pretty hysterical, but we had a nice conversation with ted after the show. the homeless man who cleans up the joint sang, and is very nice. i gave him change and an earring. my dad had to pick us up, at about 9:15. that turned out to be good, even though becca was sick and had to be home that early anyway. dad was annoyed that i hadn't asked him about taking her home. i suck. i came home and did some homework, but fell asleep before i'd really gotten anything done. fuck?
thursday: i am an idiot in history class. that's about all i remember. after school, i found emmicia at davis-kidd and we got muffins. i worked really hard on my math homework. it made no sense. i didn't feel very well, and told mom so when she picked me up. at home, i IMed elise hoping to clarify the mess i made on tuesday. she didn't say anything for a while, but eventually put up an away message and called me. it was crazy. details details insert minor details here.
friday: i stay home with a sore throat and a headache, but somehow convince my loving parents to let me go to LA's movie party with all the Emo Kids where we watch "west side story" which jenny, christie, and robin talk all over. we also watch "vagina monologues" and katie's 8th grade birthday party video before most people have to leave. eventually, only me, alice, and laylee are left and spend the night. it is very much fun, and very cool to be a different environment (LA's) especially with no parents around. at 11:30 we go on super x-treme pono run and alice gets arrested. there are tickets to be paid. but we rent "y tu mama tambien" and have a field day. late into the night. it's nice nice nice. lots of talking and girlish giggles.
saturday: we wake up and hang out briefly before laylee gets picked up, and alice takes me and LA over to brock's where we drive to michael's and meet up with katherine. we spend the whole day working on our english project, then go to LA's and watch "y tu mama" again with her sister. it's nice, but i'm really tired by the end and not too happy. brock takes me home past his normal curfew. this is the first time he's had to take me home from someplace far away and then drive all the way back home, like a real ride home. and probably the only time it'll be from someplace that he brought me over 24 hours before. wahaha.
sunday: about the only thing interesting that happened was brock coming over to visit me before AND after yogurt class. i crave a milkshake to heal my aching throat, so we go to sonic for the first time in ages where we huddle in my dad's jacket together. at home, we lay in the bed, research colleges, and decide to go to pratt in order to meet karen o. i love our non-logic. very little homework is done. my throat really hurts.
monday: fuck if i even remember.


THIS POST WANTS SOME DETAILED ADDED, BUT THE MAIN OUTLINE IS THERE.

listening to: look out, loop

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KATHERINE!

i suck blogging.

today is blaghhhhhh. i feel like a walnut on an airplane.
i had a really nice conversation with ted. it feels like we have a lot in common, but i think my imagination is a quickly-growing briar patch.
brandon makes me too happy for words.
i am excited to film tomorrow.

katherine came over after school until 4:30 and we edited, and worked on the cindy movie. which REALLY needs a name. we are taking suggies. we're thinking of adding some new scenes, and maybe narration, to clarify parts of the plot. also, katherine and i have been having some differing opinions about the characters and the plot, i think because of its evolution since we started this project in december. some of the original stuff stuck, and some didn't, but each of us is looking at it differently. so. we are aiming to have our release party on February 21 or thereabouts. now i'm going to go edit some more. wish us luck!

katherine came over after school until 4:30 and we edited, and worked on the cindy movie. which REALLY needs a new name. we are taking suggies. we're thinking of adding some new scenes, and maybe narration, to clarify parts of the plot. also, katherine and i have been having some differing opinions about the characters' motives. i think things evolved from the original plot, and some stuff stuck, and some stuff didn't, but it's all jumbled up in our heads. so. we are aiming to have our release party on valentine's day. or at least that weekend. anyone up for hosting? my house is always open, but i feel like our tv is such a piece of shit that it takes all the pizzazz out of watching movies. if no one volunteers, it's cool to be here. i just figured people would want a change. but i don't want to impose. could i be any more boring?! well i'm going to go edit some more. woooo!

11pm and i have NOT STARTED MY HOMEWORK. i don't know if i've ever waited this long, truly. and i have an AP U.S. test tomorrow, isn't that sick? ohhh it's just my brilliance. it's a nice night, in all honesty. i was at school till 5 working on the pro bono biweekly newsletter with tarah. we are god's editors. look out. i talked to brandon for a long time online. i also talked with sallis and becca, and wrote an article for the pro bono for tarah. then i got offline to work, but lo and behold, brandon called. actually, the phone rang in my bedroom and i couldn't hear it, so i missed it, and had to call him back. at any rate, we talked for an hour and 15 minutes on the nose and it was really nice. i love that piece of puppy lump. he needs to come closer.
as it is, i should go study for history. or do my math. or at least pretend.

HAHAHAHAAAH HOLY SHIT!!!
please go there. your left depends on it. and i'm not joking.

listening to: eugene mirman - born to be wild

hedwig was GREAT. i had a very good time.
but brandon somehow lept into my thoughts, i got tired, and earned a headache.

HAVARDI CHEESE
RITZ CRACKERS
HEAVEN?
I THINK SO.

listening to: joy division - new dawn fades

some catchy shit. look out for the loop. although i'd let it run at least twice, if i were you.
yesterday was birthday day. school was nice except for lunch and history... i'm shit for fuck. if you know what i mean. we had that history discussion, and during lunch i completely freaked out. my anxiety always gets the better of me in the end, and i sat there with my head on the picnic table instead of eating. before class, margaret tried to comfort me... it was really sweet and good of her. "it doesn't matter in the long run, these people don't matter, you're really much more articulate than you think," etc. but i still cried. it was pretty shitty, but thank god we had a shortened period. in the end, i raised my hand and said a little sentence, but i think ms. ervin still hates me brutally. possibly more, because now she can't give me a 0 for the test. AT ANY RATE. we had a pep ralley, which was okay and everything. it was kind of cool coming into the gym, with the vast amount of people that i know at this point in time. "my people" seemed to take up a huge portion of the junior class bleachers. i REALLY wanted to go sit with laylee and becca, because the latter had wanted to tell me about the nice time she had the day before. it involved peacocks, and NOW I'LL NEVER KNOW because there was no way in hell to get to them. i sat next to robin, in front of brock, lauren, katie, and LA. katherine did a lovely job on cymbals -- that bitch knows how to crash. after school, i was incredibly late for the pro bono meeting (sorry, tarah). katherine and i started talking about CELLOS (my favorite thing) and i got really distracted. gahhh. but tarah, you've gotta clue me in on what i missed. very sorry. i don't even know what i'm supposed to really write about. after that ordeal, katherine drove me and LA to edo's only to find it closed. we tried every fucking asian place on summer, and they were all closed -- until FORMOSA. we called brock, who was attempting to buy my birthday present of the tiny tap shoes from park ave thrift, but they were already sold. he met up with us shortly after, and we ordered fried shrip, fried rice, and sesame chicken as an after-school snack. it was nice, considering i hadn't consumed anything all day. after that, LA and katherine had to go buy me a gift or something, so they flew off. brock and i went back to my house, and hung out, and eventually called people to tell them to start coming over.
guest list-- brock, katherine, LA, sallis, alice, laylee, becca, william, eileen, mouse, foot. (plus mi familia)
missing-- technically, a lot of people. among them were margaret, zoe, lauren, allison, jenny, elizabeth, brittany, katie a, brandon, kristin hersh.
some of those
at any rate. mom rented 5 bollywood movies, got a chocolate ice cream cake from baskin-robbins, bought about 300 million sodas, ordered 4 pizzas. my parents are so sweet to go so far as to get a vegetarian pizza for the 3 who were there. dazzling! i will have to bring them the leftovers. plants.... shudder. god, i love the bread group.
presents in chronological order:
--a really sweet, nostalgia-inducing letter from brittany in purple glitter pen. she put on a cow parade sticker (i love cows) and brian froud stickers (i love brian froud) and it had penguins on it (i love penguins.) i really need to send her a letter.
--outing with brock on thursday after school. it isn't supposed to be a birthday present; it was just sweet, and i loved it. donuts, yarn, french. wine, women, song.
--outing with kevin on thursday night. though he had no money, he would not let me spend any. we swang swings, we rode camels, we saw god. (well. buddha, at any rate.)
--half of an ad in some fashion magazine, doodled upon by the glorious becca. it made my day very happy, to see it every time i opened my backpack. oh my how i flaunted that shit.
--devil eyes from ms. ervin that make me feel like an idiot
--picture frame and photo of eiffel tower, each painted upon by alice. arty and awesome. alice is the heppest of the cats.
--$100 amazon.com gift certificate from the fam
--package from katie. it would be nice enough to just get a letter, but the girl sent the new reissues of francesca lia block's ecstasia and primavera, as well a bag she knitted (knat?) for me. aww what a beautiful girl, stuck in arkansas with only wal-mart and no alanna. i feel so horrible for never writing.
--poem from brandon. sweet jesus what a boy is that one. if i ever find him, i'll keep him.
--paragraphs from morgan. a beautiful duck of a sister.
--IOU card for adorable huggable illnesses and an entire red velvet cake with cream cheese icing, made entirely by dear sir sallis
--3 inflatable microphones, 2 inflatable guitars, and card from LA. i feel like a total rock star now, and i can start a band no problem. who's with me?!
--korean and chinese candy bought at the asian market from katherine. although i wish she had gotten me the soft cup INSTEAD. ho ho ho. in truth, i am enjoying 2 watermelon bubble gums as we speak. and the strawberry cookies were quite nice. the yanyan was my favorite, i think.
--first 4 episodes of serial experiments lain on dvd from dad
--first 16 episodes of aqua teen hunger force on dvd from morgan
--"24 hour party people" on dvd from mom
--HOTT thrift sweater from eileen. very red and fuzzy. not unlike eileen's beautiful head.
--lots of love from laylee. she spent the night even though she wasn't supposed to. oh sweet jeebus.
--the presence of all my lovers
--no cds. i just realized that. normally that's all i get. ho ho ho.
it was a nice birthday. if nothing else, it sure fucking beats last year's out of the ballpark. i hope everyone enjoyed themselves, as i did. dancing to bollywood, cuddling like a mad dog god dam, and you know. many many thank you's to everyone who came. i was kind of sad that mom didn't sing the special birthday song. aww. it's cool. also brandon didn't call me like i expected, because the number wasn't working? i guess i typed it wrong or something, after his cell phone ate it the first time.
everybody left at just about the exact same time last night, at around 10:30. laylee was very mad, and it was adorable. we lay in my bed and listened to the new k-48 which has several amazingly happy songs. she didn't want me to be alone and get sad, so she spent the night, along with eileen and foot. foot fell asleep relatively early, in morgan's bed. eileen and morgan trekked to my room, where we talked briefly before, at about 1am i guess, the four of us fell asleep rather haphazardly spread across the bed. laylee and i were on one pillow, which i stole during the night. i hit my head on the cold cold cold windowsill a lot. the covers were sparse. i woke up with eileen's nose between my toes. laylee was completely void of blanket, and had resorted to a towel she found between the matress and the bed frame. it was all nice. laylee and i somehow woke together at 9am. i pried my foot out of eileen's face, and we crept out of bed. mom was upset that we were awake because she hadn't been to la baguette yet, and wanted to have pastries for us when we woke up. so she went right then, and came back with cinnamon rolls, chocolate croissants, and pecan bun thingies. we feasted while watching "aqua teen hunger force" which MIRACLE OF MIRACLES, my mother enjoyed!! she never likes cartoons i like. it was kind of nice. laylee's grandmother had to pick her up to go shopping at 11:30, so we said our goodbyes. goodbye, my love. oh oh. my mom looked at some of the fountain day pictures, and kept saying how happy/pretty becca is. it was very sweet. she liked our happy kissy pictures. why does no one recognize brock in those photos? what a sexy beast.
after laylee left, mom took me to the lost in paradise store for their 50-75% off sale. it was nice. i tried on LOTS AND LOTS of happy, pretty things. i hate being short and weird-shaped. it's hard to find nice things. but i did get two skirts for school -- one is really cool and the other is really soft. i got a really simplistic shirt that mom liked, and a velvet coat/jacket thingie. it's all very black and white, which is kind of depressing. oh well. it's not my fault the colorful things were badly sized or crappy looking. i also got some lobster earrings, which i find hilarious. whoaihwhahahehaoihaahaeha. okay. we spent way too much money, but it's nice to know that the clothes we bought were expensive because they WEREN'T made by poor children in sweat shops.
i came home and ate. eileen and foot were still here, watching "moulin rouge." i called brock, and we talked for a few minutes. eileen and foot left. morgan went to see "girl with the pearl earring" with mariana. i watched my bjork videos dvd that phyllis gave me for christmas, that sweet woman. katherine came over, and we editted. i felt like we got a lot a lot a lot done, but it wasn't that much, really. oh well. it was nice. brock came over, and then katherine had to leave. we watched "24 hour party people" with my family. i really like that movie. especially the "first act" featuring joy division and a great man playing ian curtis. after that, we sort of talked for a few minutes before morgan put on the "lain" dvd. it was 10:30 and brock had to leave. i hate curfews. it's last year all over again for me. gahhh the inability to drive. i really need a permit.
i was in a really grouchy mood a lot today, and unnecessarily unnice to the family and everything, i think. i have been hyper-emotion for a few days. it's shitty. i'm really sorry to anyone who has been in its path.

listening to: ice cream - letter to memphis (pixies cover)

i just got home -- kevin abducted me from 9 to 11! what a good kid is that one. oh my my.

today was pretty good. school was not that bad. i finished reading "the jungle" for history, but she didn't specify if there is a discussion or some other kind of test tomorrow. this terrifies me. i hate discussion more than... peas. or something else horrible. the math test went better than i expected. i mean, i didn't panic, which is the really good part. there was nothing that i blanked out on, but i'm sure i lost just as many points as speculated on careless mistakes. ah well. a lot of people are gone to yale for model UN. last year at this time, everybody i loved was gone away for that, and i'm very glad it's not the case this year as well. yayyy. thank you for not joining that stupid thing. it was nice having a sort of empty school. plus it's homecoming week, so lots of people were dressed up for senior citizen day. it's much more fun to watch than to dress up, i think. sallis and katherine looked very nice, though.
i did the wrong latin homework for last night, so i have none today! and in fact, i have literally no homework (minus projects). OH FUCK THE MATH PROJECT. DUE TOMORROW. i'm an idiot. well i'll do that in a minute.
THE POINT IS that since there was nothing to do cough cough, brock and i decided to go hang around after school. we went to gibson's and had some donuts, and then that stupid little strip next to it, where we visited the all-amazing YARNIVERSE. it's enough to make your head fall off. into a vat of boiling lava yarns. then we drove around for a minute, and called alice to see if she wanted to see a movie. she was not free, so brock and i went by our lonesome to "triplets of belleville." he, of course, got incredibly into the movie, and was reduced to a whimpering, quivering mass in my little lana arms. it was kind of sweet. i love that boy, and he loved that movie. it was a nice night.
i feel bad that i abandoned my mother. i completely forgot that today was supposed to be cake-buying, bollywood-renting, birthday-preparing extravaganza day. also, tarah and i had talked about seeing each other, but she didn't call, which i thought she was going to... if she had, i would've invited her to hte movie too, but i figured she was busy. ah well. sorry, tarah love.
FOR ALL PEOPLE WHO LOVE ME ENOUGH........ call one of my phones tomorrow, and see where i am. come hang out. maybe we can come find you. i don't know what's happening, but try to stop by. there will be cake and love.

listening to: ani difranco - hell yeah

GAHHHHH I HATE LIFE.
brock, alice, and i talked about going to see "triplets of belleville" tonight. i wonder what happened. maybe they went without me? at any rate, this night is shitty. laylee tried to call and couldn't get through. that would've fixed thing. poo.

listening to: death cab for cutie - the new year

BRANDON'S CDS CAME!
i get:
--placebo without you i'm nothing
--peaches fatherfucker
--new k-48 mix hymns
--2-disc electroclash mix
--de la soul
--an amazing frank o'hara poem, written in green pen by brandon

he gets (eventually):
--some shit i don't remember.

nothing very nice to say about today. school. davis-kidd. therapy. scone. morgan was sick, poor darling.

listening to: les triplettes de belleville - sous le pont

okay, so our fire/burglar alarm is going off..... on the security system that we have never ever used. ahahhaah the parents are making the crazy noise go on and off, trying to make the beeping stop. this is hilarious. if i'm not at school tomorrow... you know why

listening to: MAKE THE BUZZING STOP

what will happen this weekend-- bollywood festival, sparklers and fireworks, everything on the planet
and uh. friday is by birthday? so. let's dance around and have some cake. come over, stay forever.

listening to: andrew bird - T'N'T

yesterday katherine came over to edit. very shortly after she got here, brock came to finally have a little bit of the photo session we've been trying to have for weeks, so that he has references for art class. he needed a picture soon, so that he could go home and paint/draw/whatever it. he was willing to sit around with me and katherine, and edit for a couple minutes but then he and morgan went to get batteries for her digicam. when they came back, brock and i attempted to take the pictures while katherine worked on the movie. however, morgan wanted that computer for some reason, so katherine and mom talked about horses while brock and i shot things. then we had to go through this whole ordeal of printing stuff out and everything.. it took too long. i nearly collapsed from hunger. brock tickled my back because he is the sweetest thing, and i love him.so right after brock left with his pictures, katherine had to leave too. i was sad that these two things we've been meaning to do for a long time coincided into one big mess. i felt like it was my fault, anyway. i thought brock would be over at about 4, and that katherine and i would be finishing up by then. instead, they both came around 12:30 and left at 4. gahhh. and to make things even more complicated, morgan had three friends over. it was chaos. they left for the thrift store right before katherine and brock went home. plus, brock wasn't feeling well, and i think he's getting a cold. i didn't hear from him the rest of the night. so i sat around alone for a long time all sad. at about 6:45 i had nothing else to do, so i went to memphis pizza cafe to meet up with morgan and co. to see a movie. kevin was there, and i said hello. he is the nicest thing. he picked me up with one arm and swung me around the parking lot. morgan and her friends are wonderful people as well. i am glad that i finally got to meet amelia, and it's always great to see eileen and mouse (who are DATING. awwww.) morgan took pictures like mad, and many of them are very nice. i think she has some photo talent, and should maybe take a class. if you can't handle all those pictures, at least look at this one. okay. i just love that one. but i know there are some other nice ones. SO we went to see "triplets of beleville" which is this strange french cartoon. it was really strange, and very good. we hung out around the studio lobby for a few minutes, waiting for amelia's (WORLD FAMOUS) father to get there. he's such a cute little musiciany man. we got home at about 9, and mom was outside in the rain because she had forgotten to take her key with her when she went out with deb for drinks. silly mater. i had nothing else to do, so i sat around lonely. i was really tired, but somehow ended up staying up till like 1:30 anyway. how irritating. i made macaroni for me and morgan. it was REALLY buttery.

listening to: the ramones - we want the airwaves

finally finished uploading the fountain day pictures! hooray for me. bitches.

1 2 3 4 cretins wanna hop some more! 4 5 6 7 all good cretins go to heaven!!!

gahhh no posting for too long. catching up makes my brain ache...
yesterday was nice. i accidentally fell asleep in a chair at davis-kidd and woke up in between two brock phone calls. i felt really rude that i'd done that, but more annoyed that i didn't get any homework done. so when i got home, i attempted to make plans for the night with laylee, then retreated to my room to educated guess and conic section algebra problems. i toiled for about 5 minutes before it was time to eat some chickens and leave. dad drove me to white station to see kevin's one-act. i got there before laylee and becca, but dad wouldn't sit around to wait. that's okay, because they were late anyway. i went in and mrs. j was taking tickets with tim shaver.
mrs. j: who are you here to see tonight?
me: kevin nuckolls
mrs. j: ohhh are you his girl?
me: nahhh
mrs. j: do you wanna be?
me: yeah, you know it *with laughter*
so she proceeded to ask my name in order to set me up with that handsome fella. and tim just giggled away all gushery flip flop. the one-acts themselves were okay. the first was a "comedy" with lindy and davis but i wasn't really amused... the second had joseph w, olivia h, and some girl i don't know, and it was a little funnier. the third was kevin and meg robb, and it wasn't supposed to be funny. they did a very good job, and i enjoyed it a lot. bravo, kiddies! afterwards, we walked kevin to his car where he was parked next to meg. i think i broke shit off her car, but tim fixed that junt. laylee, becca, and i proceeded to walk to backyard burgers where we had milkshakes until brock met us. then laylee's mom came and took her and becca to hi-tone, while brock drove me. i was worried that we were going to be late, since the hi-tone site said that the show started at 9, and we didn't even leave backyard burger until about 9:15. however, we were sitting around at an almost empty hi-tone for quite a while before the opening act even went on. he wasn't too interesting, but my how he went on. finally he went away, and one mr. ANDREW BIRD took the stage. can i simply state that i am newly in love? the man is beautiful. i kept wriggling when he would walk by our table, before the show, and i could hardly contain myself. the opener was such a blah little set that we were all really tired, and i was terrified that the show would be a let down. but andrew bird is fucking god. he started his set by.... whistling. and jesus can that man whistle. then he would play his violin, and it would loop so that he would be harmonizing with himself. he wore his guitar on his back so that he could swing it around and play it sometimes, too. and he had a xylophone on a music stand as well. it was amazing. so much sound for just one man. even when it was just the violin with the loop, i couldn't get over it. not to even mention his voice-- that shit is honey. it's similiar to jeff buckley's in a more smooth and rolling sense. the songs sound like water, if that helps. our ride home was william, even though he couldn't make it to the show. and when we had called, we asked him to get us at 11:30, which was sad because by then we were so simply entranced by the music. we hated to go, oh we did. brock left at about 11:25. he didn't have to be home until midnight, but he wanted to be home early for the first time he was allowed out on a school night. that is a very good idea. such is the like of things i will never think. becca, laylee, and i even stayed a few minutes after our watches said 11:30 because it was just so amazing. we couldn't pull away. before we left, i got the new album, weather systems, but i'm disappointed at how short it is. it was probably around 11:45 when we got outside, but william was nowhere to be found. apparently the clock he was looking at was like 30 minutes early, so he was a bit late. that was fine because we got to hear more of the show, from outside in the freezing cold. although of course i wish we had gotten to see the end. i feel like his climax and closing would've been AMAZING, just because of the nature of the show. he was beautiful... my first thought when he started playing was "gazelle" but brock said "stork" because of the way he would lift one leg while he played. and his little face, and his little beauty... ohhhhh love. the cd i bought has "an eight minute film" which i really hope contains live footage. if so, i am going to have a party for those eight minutes, and you bitches will be there. at any rate. william came eventually. and nearly RAN ME OVER. christ. i felt bad about demanding a ride... oh well. they dropped me off, and i went and unlocked the storm door -- only to discover that dad had locked the door that NOBODY has a key to. i was really annoyed and rang the doorbell, but nobody came. so i went to my damn window, which apparently has the lock broken again. i opened it and started to climb in, only to find morgan in my bed!! i don't know which one of us was more surprised. well. she was pretty freaked out, so i guess she can win. at any rate, i did the rest of my math homework and went to bed at about 1.
school today was okay... nothing really out of the ordinary, that i can remember. oh, i fell down a stair or two, and now my foot really hurts. and laylee had our lunch, and it made me veeeeryyyyyy happy. beau got suspended because he made a dumb joke on the morning announcements -- "as they say in the tampon business, see you next period!" and they fucking SUSPENDED him!!! if that's not the dumbest fucking thing. i hate white station's crazy ass. no warning, no parent meeting, no nothing. suspended, just like that. i think they were just so shocked, it was the first thing that popped into their stupid empty heads. GAHHh. i don't even LIKE that kid, and i didn't like his stupid joke, but i hate the fact that you can't even talk about fucking periods without somebody beating your ass. what the fuck!?1 okay end rant. in study hall, i attempted to read "the jungle" for history class, but allison kept singing "welcome to the jungle" and i was about to go nuts. so we took the obvious route, and wrote a parody. it was funny. "welcome to the jungle, upton sinclair! and mary sigal! sigggall!! siggealll!!! precious precious! welcome to the jungle, we got meat!" WELL it was funny to us. after school, we had a pro bono meeting about the newsletter, which i am now going to be working on as an editor. that is pretty cool. i am only doing it because tarah was like "we need an excuse to see each other!" speaking of, the painting that she did of me in the bathroom won something in the scholastic contest thing that everyone on the planet entered. bravo, tarah!! i am very proud. after the meeting, brock and i drove to his house so that he could put on his Weekend Shirt and get some Oh's which is the only cereal he will eat. that spoiled bitch. we then drove to alice's house to meet up with her, allison, and LA. brock and i, windows down, followed alice, in her wicked new van, to park ave thrift store where i tried on little boy shirts. brock found a lot of hott hipster shirts, but neither of us bought anything because we were both entirely void of money. alice got a very cool skank-flapper skirt, and allison got a kroger shirt and a little boy's chicago bulls shirt. the highlight of the trip was when i found TAP SHOES. i put on one, and a glittering red slipper, and i danced those fucks. but everyone else was in line, and i felt silly so i didn't dance too much. plus those shoes were kind of small. i wish i had taken tap dancing... sigh. maybe i should go back to some kind of dance class. i could very well love it. anyone up for it? next we went to backyard burger because everyone was starving, and we needed cheap. as stated, brock and i had no money anyway, plus we were supposed to go back to my house at around 6:15 to go to dinner with the fam before heading off to the orpheum, so that was cool. we bummed a couple fries and took picture with alice's digicam. brock made this great comment about how we were allowed to bum food now becuse we don't have to bum rides. i was in love with it because he was inferring that i am not bumming rides off of him. i belong in that passenger seat, bitches. it just made me really really happy. brock just does. then we drove to walgreen's where LA bought a huge ass amount of matches. in the parking lot outside, we attempted to light sparklers, but it was no avail. the wind was too strong. we even stood all in a little circle in order to keep the air away, but nothing was working. eventually, we just lit the rest of that pack of matches on fire and threw it on the pavement, and tried to light the sparklers like roasting marshmallows (or potatoes...) round the campfire. and even still, we only got one lit. so we lit an ENTIRE pack of matches on fire, and we all had sparklers and we ran around and it was beautiful. unfortunately by now it was almost 6, and brock is GREAT and wanted to make a good impression on my parents by getting home slightly early. i called them on the way to let them know we were coming, when i was finally informed, when we were next to the central library, that plans had changed. foot wasn't going to get to the house until 7:15, so we were going to have stay at home instead of going out to eat. i was really put out, because i had just gotten into the hanging out spirit, what with the sparklers and all. those things just put me in a tizzy, and i become a total 3-year-old. it's pretty sick and sad. sigh. i guess being here was ... okay. brock and i listened to some music, and burned the andrew bird cd for him, but that's about it. oh, we had a mad scramble on my bed over... what was it? i can't rememeber. something silly. we always have wild fights over silly things, but it's so much fun. it started out as a tickle fight on my bed, that evolved into me sitting on brock and him kicking at me furiously, into us running in a circle around the house a few times until mom got in the way. ah well... then we ate pizza while morgan summarized almost the first half of les mis for brock, because he wanted some summary before we got to the play, so that he could follow. foot didn't get to the house until about 7:20 so we rushed out the door when she arrived. we were on time for the show and everything, so that was good. it was GREAT, and i really enjoyed it. i liked it much better than the first time, where i'd already had to deal with the family listening to the damn CD of it nonstop for an entire year. and this is NOT an exaggeration. i was REALLY surprised at how many of the tunes and lyrics i remembered... not to mention the specific voices and arrangements that were on that album, so i definitely had something to compare it to. there were lots and lots and lots of great oboe parts, which made me very happy. i kept going "OBOE!!" and killing the general population. our seats were not very good, but they were the best we could get buying for six people at the last minute. we brought binoculars, which i used a little bit. cosette terrified me. her voice was shrieky and insanely high-pitched, and when i looked at her in the binoculars, her face was about to pop off. similiar to chelsea. it was nuts. the best part of the play was when the thenardiers ended a scene with me and brock's married couple sit-com bit. it was so great. they took that shit from us, i swear to god. but yeah. i won't bore you with those details. i enjoyed myself. we got out, where we saw mrs. moore (me and morgan's first grade teacher) with her husband walking to their car. she looks the same as ever. she kept saying how me and morgan look exactly the same now. she asked if brock was my boyfriend, and i said no... mom said he was part of the family. ahaha. it was funny. why is it that people always assume we're dating? le sigh. the familia made nice conversation on the way home. mom had gotten us all chocolate roses from her school orchestra's fundraiser. they were lovely. also, i REALLY like that brock didn't leave the second we got here. i hate quick ends to things like that. they should drizzle away, like sandcastles. brock came in and had a drink, and we got his CD and listened to some more music, and talked, and things were just nice. i wish he could've spent the night, like foot. i wish i was a guy? i wish he was a girl? i wish his parents weren't silly? such is the life. i wanted him to just call his mom, and scream "TORNADO FOREVER!" and never leave our silly house. he actually made jokes about things he could say that he could spend the night too, like that he was too tired to drive. it was just sad that he didn't do it. maybe if he asked regularly, instead of always assuming the no, she would've said yes by now... or maybe if our parents would actually go hang out some time. hahhaha that would probably worsen the situation. great scott! it's 1:30am. it's time to put the girlies to bed, as they have fallen asleep on the couch watching amelie. oh, i got my fountain day pictures back from margaret today but... it is really too late to scan them. i'll do it tomorrow, bitches. tomorrow:
-scan fountain day pictures
-read LOTS of "the jungle"
-burn brandon's fucking cds
-photo session with brock
-edit with katherine
-MAMA otherlands thing?
-if none of that, find something/someone to do in the evening
-get sedated

listening to: the ramones - chinese rock

response to katherine's blog because she has no comments and it's long anyway---
i appreciate that i am your homecoming queen. i can't believe evan said he wished i had won!!! a lot of people said they'd voted for me... i wonder how many votes it takes to win? i bet there is a cheat in the system. named joseph williams because he doesn't think i'm hot. who the hell couldn't!? bastard.
i wanted to come to the pro bono recycling meeting after school today, but i couldn't. i was really late doing everything, apparently... i hung out with william, becca, laylee, and kevin at the locker after school for the usual few minutes. brock didn't appear, which he normally does. then i went to my locker, and headed out. laylee and becca were in the lobby, saying that brock was looking for me. (irony...) they left, and i went out front, where i found NO ONE. it was nuts. so i walked to brock's car to pick up something i left there. i was upset because i think i flunked my ass out of that history test, and dan ying had borrowed my book, forgotten to give it back, and disapperaed from the face of the planet. not to mention that somebody had my photos, and somebody else had... something else of mine. i can't remember what it was, so that must be good. anyway. brock was really sweet, and drove me around to the parking lot where dan ying usually is to see if she was there... which she was not. he dropped me off in some parking lot around the block, which was really funny to me. why didn't he just drop me off at davis-kidd? the world may never know. doing chemistry and algebra cleared up my brain a little, and i was not upset... only really really really tired. i can't wait for this week to end. i'm pretty glad, now, that i don't have those photos because they would be distracting me like they did last night. thank youse for taking them off my hands... how much do doubles cost?

listening to: the dishes - french kissing
(download this... it's so much fun!!!!)

i finally finished monday's post. yay for me! wootie! i need to go call margaret so that i can study with her i hope i hope i hope.

listening to: nelly furtado - powerless

you're pimpin, baby, and you're feelin fine

after school today, brock and i drove to turtle's where i bought 2 copies of the new ani difranco album educated guess. brock wouldn't let me buy it for him, but i insisted. i think he would have just left me with both copies if it hadn't been so damn good. jenny and elizabeth were hanging at turtle's, and it was nice to see them however briefly. then we drove to walgreen's to pick up the fountain day pictures (thank god laylee found them finally!!). once we arrived home, we got snacks and studied the pictures, which turned out really nicely for the most part. they doubled the roll, which annoyed me, but it will be nice to give away the pictures to whoever wants them. brock wants to use some of them as references for art class. hooray for laylee and her mad beautiful photo skillz. i heart you, pup. at any rate. we opened our cds at the same time, and poured over the amaaaazing liner notes. they are very very cool. this album is awesome because ani did everything herself -- wrote, sang, played, recorded, and mixed every song all by her lonesome. she never ceases to amaze me. le sigh. and the album is GREAT. i can tell i'm going to love it, and i can't wait to. so far i will recommend that everyone download "bliss like this," "company," and "oragami." or just go ahead and listen to the whole album, see if i care.
anyway. brock and i were very happy birds. but he had to go home. and then i died.
on a more cheerful note, we decided to re-try Happy Tuesday because it never really got started before that shit fell through. and it will be easier now that brock can drive. WOO. boy howdy. we should just have Music Appreciation class once a week, and i am not joking. we will sit around and listen to cds and look at lyrics and liner notes and beautiful things and discuss. open invitation only.
i started to scan the fountain day pictures, but i'm not done yet because the scanner was acting like a bitch. it took me forever to get as many done as i did... and you can see those few here. and i'm REALLY sorry i still ahven't finished my weekend post... i'm so fucking behind!!!! gahhh!!
then again, it's 12:45am and i have a history test tomorrow i've barely studied for. hoorah!
becca, my hot tittie lover with the sweetest honey and oats lotiony smell, has a head full of flowers and a purely pink torso. ask anyone. i love her so dearly, we will be married in the days ahead.
today-- beautiful ani listening day + fountain day pictures!
wednesday-- study party with margaret feat. fooood
thursday-- andrew bird show! you bitches better be there.
friday-- les mis, muthafucka.
saturday-- GOD ONLY KNOWS.
someday-- marry becca, laylee, brock, etc.
truly i need to see hedwig before it goes away. and next weekend will be bollywood. ho hum. a pirate's life more me.

listening to: andrew bird - ides of swing

>From: alanna
>To: hitonecafe@hotmail.com
>Date: Mon, 19 Jan 2004 17:12:05 -0800 (PST)
>
>will the andrew bird show this thursday be all ages?


From: "Dave Green"
To: koolsilver@yahoo.com
Subject: Re:
Date: Tue, 20 Jan 2004 11:08:19 -0600

yes...$10 for under 21.




EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
please please please will anyone come with me?

listening to: ani difranco - swim
(the new album is GREAT!!!!!)

ANDREW BIRD is playing the hi-tone on thursday!!! is anyone willing to try it out with me? i don't know if it's all ages, but i would LOVE LOVE LOVE to go... please, guys. he was in squirrel nut zippers, he played on kristin hersh's latest, he's on righteous babe records, and he plays the violin. nothing could be better!
check it.

(i apologize for the as yet undone post below.)

on saturday, i attempted to clean up my room and simultaneously make plans for the x-treme moovee party + sleepover. i will not bore you with those details. brock came over at 4:30 and helped me clean my room (by throwing my sorted clothes all over the place and creating a 'literature pile' on my stacked-up desk). LA (lauren henry, from now on) made many calls for us, and we thank her profusely. i invited laylee, becca, and whoever they happened to be with, and sallis, who didn't get the message until 11 and could not come. then brock and i lay around on the bed, making attempts to talk, but i kept getting calls. i talked to alice for a long time, and it was very good. i don't get to talk to alice alone generally, so that was nice. she is awesome, and i loved seeing her two nights this weekend.
eileen and foot came over at around 6:15 and scuddled away with morgan. brock and i were on morgan's bed when alice and hunter arrived, first of the party batch. we stood around the living room weirdly for a few minutes before LA, lauren, and emily arrived. at this point i become completely unconcious of how people are arriving. i can't really remember what happened. i just know that we watched "much finer" and BB3 to kick off movie nite, because lauren hadn't ever seen BB3 and we just finished the first cut of "much finer" and we needed suggies. while watching, katherine arrived, and then jenny and robin. jenny and robin... very secluded all night. they sat on the loveseat (no comment), talked nonstop through the movies, and left the room for long periods of time. they also left the earliest. i feel bad that they didn't have fun... apparently, they didn't plan on coming until LA told them hunter would be here. i think that's really dumb, but what can i say? i hadn't realized that they were so close, i guess. we put on LA's new kids on the block video for about five minutes. then we put on "legend" for about 10 minutes. i think hunter made a comment about how much better "labyrinth" was, so we watched that instead. i kept saying "THIS IS MY FAVORITE PART" because it was. i don't really think about how i do that all the time, but it was really apparent when people who didn't usually hear it got to listen to me say it over and over. during the "dance magic" song in which morgan and i sang and danced, becca, daniell, and stephanie the german exchange student arrived. a few minutes later, after the dance, kevin and laylee arrived. by now, it was insanely hard finding a place for everyone. hunter, alice, LA, lauren, katherine, brock, and i were on the floor right in front of the (ancient, piece of crap, blue lips) tv, as it was. it all worked out. i think hunter eased up a bit more after kevin got there, too. when labyrinth was over, we went back into the computer room to watch some of the voodoo village footage. apparently, it was a bust. i wasn't really in the room for most of it, because i was saying goodbye to jenny and robin, and then to becca, daniell, and stephanie. apparently stephanie had an awesome time. she told me that we reminded her of her friends in germany, and she hugged me. she was very sweet, and i wish i had a class with her. after that, we put on a japanese movie called "tampopo" which kevin had rented from black lodge under my family's account. mwahahaha. we also made popcorn which katherine had brought, because she is very sweet. only a few minutes into the movie, lauren, LA, emily, and i walked down to the shell station to buy some more dr. peppers because, alas, we had run out. i put on the first pair of shoes i could find in my house, and they were so big i nearly fell down running across poplar. boat fucking shoes. at any rate. tampopo was good, and i remember watching three completely scenes of it with my aunt phyllis in georgia once upon a time. there was a funny/happy sex scene with food. a strange, but good movie. foot and morgan fell asleep while it was on, and as it ended, eileen put them to bed very nicely. after that, we talked a little bit before laylee and kevin had to leave. we started "secretary", but then alice and hunter had to leave. i walked them to the door and had an awkward moment with hunter... that is too bad, because i like him and i hope he doesn't stay with the awkward memory of me. we started over secretary, but before the credits were even done, we stopped a few minutes to talk. "a few minutes" turned into forever and ever until we were suddenly in the comic room, eating cookie dough out of the bucket and playing donkey kong country like nobody's business. when lauren said she needed to go to bed, i was like "AHH THE MOVIE!" so the remaining five trekked back into the den. lauren and emily stretched across the couch with blanket and pillows, and LA, eileen, and i squished onto the loveseat. it was love. well. i really enjoyed that movie. i didn't know what to expect, since becca and laylee didn't find it too good/hot, and brandon is absolutely in LOVE with it. iii, in my own respect, thought it was a great movie. i am not only very glad i saw it, i really really enjoyed it for all that's worth. i think it's probably underappreciated, too... such is the life of me. also, right after what i guess is the climax, we paused the movie and talked and took pictures of ourselves for like an hour. lauren and emily had fallen asleep on the couch, and looked hysterical. LA, eileen, and i were wide awake and bristling. somehow, i think that made the movie even better when we turned it back on. then we spent some quality time with our friends the suicide girls before eileen trotted back to the seat o' love to sleep. LA and i got to talk for a long while, and that was awesome. she is so very cool, and i wish i saw her more. i will make a point of calling her this weekend, now that i have her numbah. she and i drifted off to sleep in my cloud bed at around 7am. we woke around 11am to lauren jumping on us. god damn!! that was okay, because we had la baguette pastries to eat while viewing "ghost world" which i hadn't watched in a really long time, and i still love it. yayyyy. almost right afterwards, brock called and i talked to him for a few minutes before lauren, emily, and LA had to go home. we said our tearful goodbyes... alas, alas. then morgan left for rehearsal, so i hung out with foot and eileen for a while. eileen had to go home like 5 seconds before morgan came back. it was sad. foot was still here when brock came over after yogurt, at around 5, i guess? i don't know when he got here because i was in the shower, and then i was dancing naked around my room, simply for lack of clothes. once i found him, we hung out here for a while, lay on my bed in the dark again, had lovely moments, and finally decided we should go surprise margaret at her job at high point grocery. unfortunately, i had forgotten it was sunday, so that shit wasn't open. then we went to laylee's house to surprise her, and kevin was there. i feel like we fucked over whatever they were doing, but it didn't really matter because we were only there for about five minutes before we decided to go to subway. brock's mom said he had to drive himself, and we ended up going to different subways, and going our separate ways. brock and i went to blockbuster and rented "a mighty wind" which brock did not realize i'd already seen. it was fine though. we were both so tired that it was just nice to lie on his brother's bed and giggle softly to ourselves. when i came home, i practically fell asleep on top of morgan on the couch until she pitched a fit, and i crashed in my own bed, with a mouth full of sticky marshmallow.

to clarify yesterday's incoherent post... the pictures from the x-treme moovee party + sleepover are entirely gone. i usually tell the iPhoto program to delete them off the camera right after they get to the computer, but something happened and only four of the pictures came through, yet they were all deleted. let's mourn what pictures were lost:
-laylee being cute
-kevin looking hott
-hunter looking nice
-morgan and foot asleep and adorable
-lauren asleep and leggy
-emily asleep and gorgeous
-alice's pretty back and shoulders
-me, LA, and eileen at about 4am taking super-hott pictures of ourselves
that's all i can think of right now. at least i forgot to even take pictures of the entire party in the den, because that would've been really awesome. and i didn't do it at all.

POST FINALLY DONE.

I DELETED ALL THEP ICTUERS. OHH MY GOD. WELL. IT WASN'T ME, IT WAS THE COMPUTER. BUT OH MY GOD. WHAT THE FUACKA.

listening to: eileen guitaring

apparently, the police aren't sure if elliott smith killed himself or not... they weren't positive in the beginning, but now they are even more unsure. poor guy.

i waited too long to post, and now i'm really tired and i don't want to write about today... i had a great time with katherine, lauren h, alice, and shaleen getting lost and going to psuedo-voodoo village!!
(we spent three hours getting there, finally found the street, went up and down, and left. when we got home, katherine realized that we hadn't actually gone into the gate where the 'village' is... we just saw the outside. but as far as i could tell, the gate was closed anyway. that's what we get for getting there at like 9:30pm.)
katherine and i also got a little more editting done on "much finer" after school... we're getting there, inch by inch. i'd upload it, but ghotli is down (whatta fuck!?)
at any rate... tomorrow we're going to have a movie festival/sleepover at my house, and anyone is invited. i'm not sure how many people are going to be able to spend the night, but you're welcome to come waste the day away. i want to just have movies constantly going, so that if people want to just come in and drop by, they can, and we don't have to have a set time/set group. i wonder what the family will think....
please come, and bring a favorite film.

listening to: placebo - slackerbitch

i decided at the very last second to enter some shit in scribbler. it won't make it in, but whatever. i'm a bum, trying to avoid homework. AT ANY RATE. if you would like to make any last minute suggestions, you can go to DOY and look around for some of my things... all of my ones from this past year should be here but i've been told that that page isn't working. so who knows. i already have a few picked out that i'm printing and taking to school, and i guess i will just work them off through the day. at any rate.... i'd love you if you helped out?