i am so insanely jealous

i want to move to canadia.

brittany and katie - thank you for the CDs. you sure didn't have to.

i seem to have lost my poor dead headphone. dad already ate the good ones. dear god.

right now people just really bother me. i don't like them. at all. i am going to end up like aunt ella.
she is actually my great aunt. i think.. something like that. yeah.
anyway aunt ella is my mom's mom's sister. she never got married, you know. it's actually pretty tragic. (she is more lucky than i am in this sense) her.. fiance? i think he was. maybe just boyfriend. anyway the point is he died in WWII and ella never got married. poor thing. anyway now she's living with grandma and papa in their house in remote south georgia.
so the point is i am going to end up like aunt ella, living with morgan and her husband and they'll have this huge mass hilarious family and i will have a terribly bad back and when my great neice hugs me i will fall over and i'll end up a christian addict and give out jesus cards for christmas.
except i won't be like aunt ella at all because she is far far far too sweet and nice and i will be a mean old grouch aunt. and i will never have almost gotten married.

anyway i am just sitting around thinking about the friends i do not have.

agsdhgahhah my mom just called me phyllis.

you know i had a really good talk with her the other day about. oh things. lol. music, yeah. as i said on 'i left my heart', she made me a tape of an older luscious jackson album and we listened to it and talked about it and music and a bunch of friends she has/had who are/were musicians. phyllis knows soooo many people! is that just something that happens when you are a dancer who lives in new york? well not IS a dancer, more WAS a dancer. i love phyllis. i want to be phyllis. and my mom. and ani difranco.

brittany and laylee went to see kate and leopold and apparently it was fucking hilarious. and i just called brittany's house and some strange child answered the phone and said that brittany was at starbucks with laylee. gee they seem to be getting along well....

I'M IN GEORGIA... EVERYONE GO TO THE TRAVEL BLOG

today is "Family Christmas" which means that everyone in my immediate family (sister, father, mother) gives each other presents today. because we're going to Georgia for Real Christmas and that is when santa happens and we give gifts to outer relative types. today is a beautiful day.
mom got the best gifts. morgan gave her this statue of a faery for the garden. it's really beautiful and she was like 'i dont know if i can bear to put it outside!' and dad gave her this alan lee print which is (suppposedly) exactly like the one they saw in england a million years ago and dad refused to buy for her. and mom is always going on about that and how you cant even get them anymore (which she made up because it is a better story) and dad found it for her on ebay and had a long conversation with the guy from the company that sold it to him about the san diego comic con (which is THE comic con) and how he was BRINGING ALAN LEE AND THE FROUDS!!! so dad was like 'we have to go' hence two posts ago.
and dad also gave her this great huge poetry book with three audio CDs of the poets reading their work. it was amazing. and my gift (HORRIBLY anti-climactic) was the 'soul music' terry pratchet dvd which is "a tale of sects, dwarfs and rock 'n' roll". but mom really liked it and she was surprised apparently and she was like 'i'm gonna OD on christmas excitement' and it was funny beans.
dad got three DVDs. ahhagha. mom gave him dogma and morgan gave him crouching tiger, hidden dragon which has "over 100 minutes of deleted scenes" and i find that very cool and i gave him monty python and the holy grail and that has the coolest feature thingies such as "how to use your coconuts properly" and then the knights are legos. gahdslkhga.
and morgan and i's presents were sort of matching as they usually are. i gave her boys for pele by tori amos and a tori poster. she gave me the green world by dar williams (which i dont even remember having said i wanted lol) and the self-titled le tigre album. (SO EXCITING!!! WEE!!!)
and dad gave morgan the plushie Delirium doll (who came with a little fishie) and i got Death which is great and morgan says we look alike? then mom gave morgan little setsuma smelling thingies which is lovely because setsuma is a kind of japanese orange and its lovely and she gave me a vanilla travel candle and vanilla lotion thingies.
oh and now that we're on the subject. brittany gave me a vanilla candle as well (you guys know me too well.) and she gave me a little photo album thing (which i desperately needed) and a bag of recee's (but her brother ate one and i forgive him) and frankenberry (which turns your milk pink.) and i am going now.

brittany and my family and i saw fellowship of the ring on wednesday night. it was great. i intend to write a huge comparison about it to harry potter and why it was so much better and tell you all about BilboDemon.

dad wants us to go to the san diego comic convention next year.

today i am sick and i am staying home. i am also eating cocoa krispies.
so last night chuck zimmer called and talked to dad about the play. katherine dohan as been cast as Silver. my dad is the 'lead terror', morgan is Pink, and i am Green (though i do not feel very green)
it has been decided that pink is a lovely morgan color and that silver is a lovely katherine color and that my father is not a terror.
but apparently "it's called acting"

my granny cracks me up. to death and pieces!!! my dad picked me up from school today and when i was putting my bag in the car i noticed a blockbuster bag.
me: why'd you go to blockbuster
dad: to get granny's present.
me: what is it.
dad: 'princess diaries'
me: why!!
dad: because she didnt get to see it in the theatre and she heard it was good. and it has julie andrews in it.

and i thereby died of laughter.
the end.

last night's band concert went ok

yesterday afternoon, dad, morgan, and i went to theatreworks to 'audition' for their new play Synesthesia. katherine asked me to inform her when the next play would be happening so i did and she came and it was good times. chuck zimmer is directing this one (his first with our own voice, i think) but dad and morgan were like 'how is gonna direct? he never even talks!' and it was funny. so some time in the last month or so when no one was looking he got married to a nice woman named robin. (robyn???) they have nice smiles.
point: 'auditions' consisted of filling out this form. it had question thingies on it like. 'what can you bring to this show' and so i didnt know so katherine wrote on mine 'I can bring happiness to all !! :)' and i scratched out happiness and wrote 'death and pain' and scratched out that and wrote 'cheese' and scratched out the whole thing altogether. and then morgan wrote something about how i can be their guinea pig and i just left it like that. and then i said something about how it would be a new and different experience.
so after that we went upstairs (i didnt even know there was an upstairs except for the little lighting box!!) and its like a dance studio with a mirror wall and the floor and all that.
ok now would be the time to tell you that it's not regular auditions. it's more like. acting exercises and seeing who's interested and telling people what the show is about. right.
so robin had us stand in a circle and bill baker (zak's dad, kimberly's husband) sort of introduced new people such as katherine and tracy, who have not been in OOV shows before. and then he introduced me (and butchered my name) as morgan's sister and dad's daughter so you know. thats kind of the bad thing is that i am eternally a limb. have you noticed? i always seem to be tacked on to someone else's name because i'm not really ever doing anything for myself. and anyway i was basically just going to this audition so that katherine wouldn't be alone and to make my sister happy because it's not really my thing, i guess. actually it might be and i just really don't know. i don't really have a thing. at all. the point is that i went and i was the fifth wheel.
ok so then bill went to sit down next to chuck and they had clipboard things and it was really intimidating the whole time how they were always looking at you, and i guess that was the point, but they would like take notes and gahgalkhd. i mean i know they weren't like 'ok well we shouldnt put HER in this play' but it was like. kind of skary. anyway.
so most of it was exercise things and it involved colors. like robin told us to imagine a color we really really didnt like and imagine a weapon and then we had to go around the room and destroy plants of this horrid color which were all over the place. (my color was orange and i had a rock. morgan had a ruler aghaha.) and let's see i can't remember what else.
at one point they had people read lines for the speaking parts. there's only like. four or so? so most people will be cast as colors, i think. dad and katherine read. dad read the part for this character joel, and good lord it was hilarious. he was like this sci-fi guy and nearly everything he said was quoted from some movie and dad did it really well of course and bill was like smiling to death and pieces which is so funny because he's never smiling to death and pieces.
then we got back into a circle and robin would say a color and we passed the color around the circle by doing some thing that represented it to us. i'm really uncomfortable doing things like that and i dont know if i'm going to be in the show because of that. then we were put into pairs and given a word emotion thing and we had to act it out sort of and tracy and i got 'exasperated' so i was supposed to be like her little sister or something and i wanted everything and she went insane.
morgan and dan are so damn cute.
you remember dan. the one who is getting kicked out of choir for being gay. yes.
this would be a good time to tell you that sarah rushakoff uploaded pictures from ecstatic disco nights to their site thing and they can be attacked here. and i have to go clean out the van.

I MURDERED MY COOKIES!

A mere Statistic:::goes to get more mountain dew::
aLittleStarlight:fun day
A mere Statistic:gkdjsaklgjasdklg
A mere Statistic:lol
A mere Statistic:I HATE WHEN I POUR A CUP
A mere Statistic:OF MOUNTAIN DEW
A mere Statistic:AND FUCKING LEAVE IT OUT ON THE TABLE
A mere Statistic:GKJSDAGKJASKLGJKLSJG
A mere Statistic:SDGKLSDJGKJDG
A mere Statistic:GKLJKGJ;SDGJKSLG
A mere Statistic:::runs out to get it::

Take the What Cat Are You? test by webkin!
ahhahahah no. this is SO terribly inaccurate. i'm going to take it again. but i do have a cd case/jacket/thing with this picture on it. (it's the one full of ani cds. C-Di) the image is quite cute but i'm getting sick of it.



Take the What Cat Are You? test by webkin!
phhhhhh now i've got the same one as brittany. and this one is ALSO terribly inaccurate. where the hell is the grouch cat. where is the grail!?



Take the What Cat Are You? test by webkin!
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHH they just keep getting ... 'better'
less accurate dammit.

anyway it would seem there are only five choices, none of which are me and none of which are grail. i loathe this test.

today was the band concert and it was one of these black dress or skirt/blouse deals. so i didnt have a black dress or any of that. so we went all over and ended up getting this AMAZINGLY COOL skirt at moondance (my favorite place i swear) and i needed black shoes. so mom took me to chinatown imports and i got some little $6 chinese shoes there but theyre rather small, actually...
point: i needed new shoes. and i actually TOLD mom so, which wasnt very smart, let me tell you. the point is we went to oak court mall and mom attacked the shoes and i was like 'nooo' and i made her take me to journeys because its reasonable there. i like it there, sometimes. so the point is we went and i got new black converse shoes (just the same as my old ones) except that theyre kinda... big. i should let you know now i have THE tiniest feet ever. ok maybe not. but they are damn small. and the smallest that anyone has is a 6 and mine are like 5 and a half, usually. or something along those lines. or smaller.
point: i forgot that my old converse shoes were in mens sizes!! and they fit just fiiiine, it was like a 4 or something. so the new ones are going to be large, once i start wearing them around...
point: mom made me try on a million and one pairs of shoes (boots, really) because i wanted some sort of. i was like 'i wish i had some of those big clunky black boots' and then mom was like 'ok' and before i knew it she was asking the evil man at journeys and i went alksdhglashg. i am not going to get into it.
point: i ended up getting clunky black boots and i love them to death.

also, the reason for all these shoes was that today was the varsity band concert (of which i am a part of) it was also the orchestra, jv band, jazz band, choirs' concert. (why is it that there are like four choirs)
did you know that zak baker was in the jazz band.
the jazz band is amazing amazing amazing wondrously good. theyre always the last to perform, as they are the finale and whatnot. and it was discovered and noted by katherine dohan and i that the guitarists and bassists of the jazz band all look the same from the back row of the auditorium when they are all wearing tuxedos and top hats. because they all have fluffy shaggy hair. well actually you can tell patrick (katherine said that was his name? well it's rather suiting. he looks like a damn leprechaun. a tall one, too.) apart from the other ones because his hair is deliriously long. it looks like. crimp n style barbie's: massively blond (dyed, i'm sure) and remotely wavy and as long as jingle bells.
point: he frightens me. A LOT.
another point: he looks very funny in a top hot.
yet another point: zak had hat hair today.
and another: you'll notice that all the guys in jazz band wore their tuxes and hats (and carried their canes) all day long, while the lesser, uncool beings of the other bands/orchestras/choirs, removed theirs.
jazz band members have mass pride. (no one else does) they know they are loved. like beans.
and anyway there are only three girls in the damn jazz band. (i think..... don't quote me!) and one is robin's sister acacia and she is quite cool because i say so.
anyway i have gotten horribly off-topic. it would be best to leave, especially since laylee is IMing me now.

sjusaeyeguy:did u kno that grapefruits contain antioxidants which stop some signs of aging
sjusaeyeguy:IM THE GRAPEFRUIT LADY
sjusaeyeguy:IM INVINCIBLE

i'm supposed to blog for brittany that i tried to take my portable cd player to the harry potter movie but my parents (who dragged me there) wouldnt let me.

Super Saiyan AJ: and our umbrellas shall be open under the sun
Super Saiyan AJ: you're my hero
A mere Statistic: I've never even been to poland

Super Saiyan AJ:yeah i'll stop by and do a strip-tease
Cj and Laki:HUBBA HUBBA HEY says laylee

Laylee2000:and people take me more seriously when i have long hair
Laylee2000:i appear more airhead-y w/short hair. with long hair people just think im fucked up

Laylee2000:KROGERS HAS GOOD COFFEE

POOR LAYLEE

nick makes me hungry

i lub lappy joose.

Laylee2000:i liked ur skrit tons and tons
aLittleStarlight:glaskdhasldkghlsdkgahasgdlhk what skirt

laylee told me to come blog so here i am. bliss.

A mere Statistic:are you ungood at math
A mere Statistic:I know I am
A mere Statistic:blue moooooooooon
A mere Statistic:you saw me
A mere Statistic:standing
A mere Statistic:alooooooooone
A mere Statistic:why does school attack you
A mere Statistic:let's run away
A mere Statistic:to a schoolless land

dad: *returns from grocery* alanna? i think you'll be happy with the choice of cereal for you
me: what is it
dad: *holds up COUNT CHOCULA box*
me: *mass cackle thing*
dad: cause i love to see you smiiile

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ALL THESE COOKIE PARTS

Cj and Laki:kjnkljg
Chaodoom:hullo.
Cj and Laki:i slobbered on it\
Chaodoom:ok
Cj and Laki:you have to believe we arw masgic
Chaodoom:how... appetizing
Cj and Laki:IT S[PARKLES
Chaodoom:ok. i believe that.
Chaodoom:it does?
Chaodoom:keen.
Cj and Laki:SDYTPOPPOIT
Chaodoom:now you're just being silly.
Cj and Laki:do you see it!?
Chaodoom:yup.
Cj and Laki:li
Cj and Laki:ar
Cj and Laki:no it really sparkels
Cj and Laki:no one believes me
Cj and Laki:youre taking me over
Cj and Laki:even the burnt part sparkles
Cj and Laki:mmmmm
Cj and Laki:crumbly bread cookies
Cj and Laki:thwack thwack

brittany is here and the DAMN PLANS ACTUALLY WORKED SORT OF. because i had to come an hour earlier, as brittany's tai chi class died and then she couldnt get in touch with katie so she still came at 1 and it was damn confusing. and then brittany's whole family died off to the restaurant with us and brittany 'will be a very good lawyer.' (in bed) yeahhh let me tell you about it. she has the 'the potential to be dirty' according to laylee. oh yes laylee didnt get to come to the restaurant :( but she DID show up at borders like waayyy late and she attacked me and we fell onto the suzanne vega cds. and katie listened to the smashing pumpkins too loud on her headphones and we could all hear them and then she wouldnt let us turn it down and you know billy corgan has a remotely annoying voice. esp when its all teeny tiny and floating around all over the place. and uh. brittany and i gave katie the last two books in the 'his dark materials' series by philip pullman and that was happy. and then katie had to leave and brittany invited laylee to my house
[brittany: i did not!
alanna: you did too
brittany: so whaaat!]
and she stayed for hours and hours on end but then she called her mom and she had to leave. :( and watched the 'fuckingest' movie [according to brittany] and it was called 'say anything' but then we watched a godawful movie called 'a knight's tale' and then and then uhm. we danced and danced to laylee's really cool mix cd for alanna and then she got tired and that was sad because we were like wooohaghahhaha. then her mom came and we ran out into the street and we had to chase down her car and give her the 'rockstar x-mas cd' that brittany made her. even though she is a jew. brittany is a terrible person. she did not say she wanted it!! no she didnt!! and it had fake beatles on it and people who were NOT simon and garfunkel and really bobby helms. HHAHAHAHAH. billy bobby. and some GODAWFUL shedaisy songs. but there were some good parts like john lennon's 'so this is christmas' because i told her to put that on there. and she found tori doing 'have yourself a merry little christmas' and BIF doing 'santa claus is coming to town' and that was funny as beans. and patti smith doing 'white christmas' and that was amusing and she couldnt quite hit the high notes and i liked it. and SPACE GHOST and the LEGION OF DOOM!!! ahhh that was the bestest. est. and uhm yes i am done with that.
so the point is that laylee's mix was really good!! and i knew a couple of those violent femmes song, like the one that CUT OFF after like 10 SECONDS. and brittany doesnt know how to spell femmes. I AM NOT ELMO. i am like. oscar. i will not sing this song. falalala. ok i can post now.

I HATE THE SESAME SEED TEST

Your personality type is: Elmo

You are cute, and everyone loves you. You are a best friend that no one takes the chance of losing. You never hurt feelings and seldom have your own feelings hurt. Life is a breeze. You are witty and calm most of the time. Just keep clear of backstabbers, and you are worry free.

brittany and i are the worst plan-makers EVER. seriously. katie and laylee and brittany and i have been trying to make plans the last HOUR. katie left about half an hour ago and since then i have been trying to get the plans straight. ok i THINK i'm supposed to show up at brittany's tai chi class, beishou lin, at 1 and then her parents are driving all of us to a restaruant, saigon li (except it might not be that one, it might be another one) and then we're going to borders after lunch and then either our parents are picking us up or we're going home with brittany. and laylee and katie cant stay so i'll probably go home with brittany except that it might be easier on her parents for her to go home with me so i dont know. anyway........

aLittleStarlight:WELL WHY DONT I JUST GO THERE INSTEAD OF DAMNED BEISHOULINGA SDLKGHALSDGHDL
Atea Diosa:yes but we might go to another one i don't know alanna ;_;
aLittleStarlight:o.o
aLittleStarlight:oh
Laylee2000:HAHAHAHAHh
aLittleStarlight:*dies*
aLittleStarlight:god
Laylee2000:oh god
Atea Diosa:thats why.
Laylee2000:ur plans are very hard people
Atea Diosa:thast why i watn you to come to me
Atea Diosa:so i can take you where we're going
aLittleStarlight:these plans are SHITTY
Laylee2000:this is so difficult, plans with you two are always confusing and never work
aLittleStarlight:lol i know
aLittleStarlight:god
aLittleStarlight:watch this
aLittleStarlight:i'm gonna be the only one there
Laylee2000:HAHA
aLittleStarlight:and i'll come at the wrong time
Laylee2000:yes yo are
Laylee2000:HAHAHAHAHHA
Laylee2000:alanna that wilL SO happen
aLittleStarlight:and then no one will even come at 1
Atea Diosa:lolol no you'll call first.
aLittleStarlight:and brittany will be slaving away at home working
aLittleStarlight:shh i'll come too early
Atea Diosa:well i'll be there at 1 lol.
Laylee2000:me n katie wont show and britta will kill me monday @ school
aLittleStarlight:and you wont be able to reach me
Atea Diosa:.......LOL WTF
aLittleStarlight:and i'll like sit there in the rain and the place will be closed
Atea Diosa:LOL
Atea Diosa:hahahahha
aLittleStarlight:because like. it burned down
Laylee2000:AWWWWW
aLittleStarlight:and so i sit outside it all night
Atea Diosa:i'll call you if its closed lol
Atea Diosa:HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
Atea Diosa:*rolls around laughing*
Laylee2000:Hahahahahahahaha
Laylee2000:thats precious
aLittleStarlight:LOL
Atea Diosa:ok i really need to get o sleep
aLittleStarlight:doesnt that sound likely as beans
Atea Diosa:so so hahaha
aLittleStarlight:geez
Atea Diosa:i'll call you tomorrow after my parents awaken lana
aLittleStarlight:god
Laylee2000:mkay
aLittleStarlight:i wont be up
Atea Diosa:and we'll make it so definite we can't change a thing
Laylee2000:hahah
aLittleStarlight:you'll have to leave a damn message
Atea Diosa:or something like that
Atea Diosa:so i'll wake you up
aLittleStarlight:ok hld on
aLittleStarlight:my mom or somebody will prob be up
aLittleStarlight:so talk to her
Atea Diosa:no cause i'll need to know if your parents can come
Atea Diosa:i mean can bring you
Atea Diosa:*mass spasm*
aLittleStarlight:o.o
aLittleStarlight:bring me where
Atea Diosa:to bei shoulin!!!!!!!
aLittleStarlight:the restaurant?
Atea Diosa:where else?!
aLittleStarlight:what!
aLittleStarlight:why?!
Atea Diosa:lol NO!
aLittleStarlight:i'm so confused
Atea Diosa:GALJFDSKAJ JESUS CHIRST ALALANNA
aLittleStarlight:hahahahah
Atea Diosa:I DON'T KNOW WHICH RESTURANT WE'RE GOING TO
aLittleStarlight:i love my new name
Atea Diosa:PHO SAIGON OR SAIGON LI
aLittleStarlight:well whats your point
aLittleStarlight:by then you'll know hopefuly
Atea Diosa:SO THEREFORE YOU'RE ALL COMING TO BEI SHOULIN
Atea Diosa:AND MY PARENTS ARE TAKING YOU TO WHEREVER THEY WANT TO GO
Atea Diosa:alanna its just easier on me this way but if you want to sit infront of a fucking saigonli building and we go somewhere else then so be it
Laylee2000:...imscared...
Atea Diosa:of course you are
Laylee2000:youre scaring me brittany
Laylee2000:i love you
Atea Diosa:now i'm going to bed i'll call you tomorrow alanna and laylee don't just think you can coem to borders you have to put up a fucking struggle
Laylee2000:dont kill me and eat my children
Atea Diosa:fight your mother o-weak one
aLittleStarlight:mmmmmm i'm confused
aLittleStarlight:i'll probbaly go to borders at 1
Laylee2000:haha okay i will
aLittleStarlight:and hten it will burn down too
Atea Diosa:.....OLOL
aLittleStarlight:and i'll sit outside all night in the rain
Atea Diosa:no.
Laylee2000:and ill cal u @ 9 or w/e to tell u if i can come or not
Atea Diosa:GO TO BEISHOULIN AT ONE NO REASONS ARE ALLOWED JUST GO .
Atea Diosa:OK?!
aLittleStarlight:whats saigonli
Atea Diosa:damn straight you will laylee.
aLittleStarlight:what
Atea Diosa:ok.
Laylee2000:HAHAAH alanan just stop.
Laylee2000:ill explain
Atea Diosa:JUST GO TO BEI SHOULIN ALANNA.
Laylee2000:hahaha
aLittleStarlight:ahhagha whatioahdsaglks
Atea Diosa:YOU ARE REALLY KILLING ME
Atea Diosa:goodbye
Atea Diosa has left the room.

CutiePatootie005:UR DAD IS THE KEWLIEST WITH
CutiePatootie005:WELL CRAP
CutiePatootie005:HE WAS KINDA KEWL
CutiePatootie005:DESPITE HIS SILENCE

CutiePatootie005:WHO'S GOT A MULLET
kat09987:Karolina

Atea Diosa:william on toilet : come out, come out baby!!!!!
Atea Diosa:........ *freaky scared face*

george harrison died. he is my favorite beatle. good lord. i hate it when people pretend to know things they dont.

i finished reading 'the night trilogy' by elie wiesel a little while ago. an hour or so. i don't know why they made it a triology... it's three books, yes, but the first 'night' is a biography and hte other two 'dawn' and 'the accident' are fiction.. I THINK. god i am so confused. if 'the accident' is fiction, then the character has the same name as the author. it's quite quite confusing. but anyway 'night' is about the holocaust. and then the other two are like post. and really theyre all mainly about death. i really liked them though.
ok this is what i found to be the saddest part of the whole damned book. i'm sure it wont seem as sad now, without having read everything before it, but it was the only part that made me teary-eyed. the main character (eliezer) and his father have just been taken to Gleiwitz which is this concentration camp and theyre shoved into these barracks (to go to sleep) and it's so crowded that they have to walk on people and no one's screaming or making noise or anything and people are walking on them and it's awful and there's no room to breathe and things. ehh i think there might be more to this passage than i thought. uhm. anyway....
"My father and I were thrown to the ground by this rolling tide. Beneath our feet someone let out a rattling cry: 'You're crushing me... mercy!' A voice that was not unknown to me
'You're crushing me... mercy! mercy!' The same faint voice, the same rattle, heard somewhere before. That voice had spoken to me one day. Where? When? Years ago? No, it could only have been at the camp.
'Mercy!' I felt that I was crushing him. I was stopping his breath. I wanted to get up. I struggled to disengage myself, so that he could breathe. But I was crushed myself beneath the weight of other bodies. I could hardly breathe. I dug my nails into unknown faces. I was biting all round me, in order to get air. No one cried out.
Suddenly I remembered. Juliek! The boy from Warsaw who played the violin in the band at Buna...
'Juliek, is it you?'
'Eliezer... the twenty-five strokes of the whip. Yes... I remember.' [elie got beaten at buna] He was silent. A long moment elapsed.
'Juliek! Can you hear me, Juliek?'
'Yes...' he said in a feeble voice. 'What do you want?'
He was not dead.
'How do you feel, Juliek?' I asked, less to know the answer than to hear that he could speak, that he was alive.
'All right, Eliezer... I'm getting on all right... hardly any air... worn out. My feet are swollen. It's good to rest, but my violin..." I thought he had gone out of his mind. What use was the violin here?
'What, your violin?' He gasped.
'I'm afraid... I'm afraid... that they'll break my violin... I've brought it with me.' I could not answer him. Someone was lying full length on top of me, covering my face. I was unable to breathe, through either mouth or nose. Sweat beaded my brow, ran down my spine. This was the end––the end of the road. A silent death, suffocation. No way of crying out, of calling for help.
I tried to get rid of my invisible assassin. My whole will to live was centered on my nails. I scratched. I battled for a mouthful of air. I tore at decaying flesh which did not respond. I could not free myself from this wass weighing down my chest. Was it a dead man I was struggling against? Who knows?
I shall never know. All I can say is that I won. I succeeded in digging a hole through this wall of dying people, a little hole through which I could drink in a small quantity of air.
'Father, how are you?' I asked, as soon as I could utter a word. I knew he could not be that far from me.
'Well!' answered a distant voice, which seeemed to come from another world. I tried to sleep. He tried to sleep. Was he right or wrong? Could one sleep here? Was it not dangerous to allow your vigilance to fail, even for a moment, when at any moment, when at any minute death could pounce upon you?
I was thinking of this when I heard the sound of a violin. The sound of a violin, in this dark shed, where the dead were heaped on the living. What madman could be playing the violin here, at the brink of his own grave? Or was it really an hallucination?
It must have been Juliek.
He played a fragment from Beethoven's concerto. I had never heard sounds so pure. In such a silence.
How had he managed to free himself? To draw his body from under mine without my being aware of it?
It was pitch dark. I could hear only the violin, and it was as thought Juliek's soul were the bow. He was playing his life. The whole of his life was gliding on the strings–– his lost hopes, his charred past, his extinguished future. He played as he would never play again.
I shall never forget Juliek. How could I forget that concert, given to an audience of dying and dead men! To this day, whenever I hear Beethoven played my eyes close and out of the dark rises the sad, pale face of my Polish friend, as he said farewell on his violin to an audience of dying men.
I do not know for how long he played. I was overcome by sleep. When I awoke, in the daylight, I could seek Juliek, opposite me, slumped over, dead. Near him lay his violin, smashed, trampled, a strange overwhelming little corpse."


i just don't know what i'm gonna do for my biography report (due monday) x_x... and i still havent turned in this project that was due an eternity ago because i keep forgetting about it when we get to class. as we are studying the odyssey in a very odd way and it consumes my entire attention, also as i am eating many cheesy popcorn bits.

yeah so i was in jackson, mississippi visiting my grandparents for a few days over thanksgiving break. and uhm i am going to post on the travel blog about it so yeah. laylee is mad because i dont post gahahah. i saw harry potter on friday, as i was manually forced into the damn theatre (betrayed by my family!) and it was godawful. and i bought 'dummy' by portishead and 'the bends' by radiohead and it was Big Fat Head Day. morgan did some more sketches for her Innocent Vegas Showgirl theme (thats what shes calling it, go complain to her) and theyre all gorgeous let me tell you.

A mere Statistic:fuck health
A mere Statistic:I'm never gonna be healthy I don't need to take this class
A mere Statistic:I'm gonna die of aids like last year
A mere Statistic:I'm probably like technically dead
A mere Statistic:like my heart stopped pumping a few years ago

A mere Statistic:go use this creepy vibrating cucumber thing
A mere Statistic:go like
A mere Statistic:feel like a woman
A mere Statistic:or whatever
Atea Diosa:oooooooooooooooooooooh
aLittleStarlight:...
aLittleStarlight:o.o
A mere Statistic:exactly

good lord. this is the most TERRIFYING thing i have seen in a while.

Laylee2000:im megaversatile

Laylee2000:i just got a direct hit on a bug ! ewwwww i squished it riiiiiight there w/the middle of my hand and it STUCK to my haaaand and ewwwwwww ewwwwwww ewwwwwwwwwwww its AFJSLDfkj gross. i dont like dead bugs. or live ones for that matter


A mere Statistic: ::smashs a laylee with the middle of his hand::
A mere Statistic: ::sticks::
A mere Statistic: ewwwwwwwwwww ewwwwwwwwww

Laylee2000:why yes, yes i am
Laylee2000:why yes, i am god.

BRITTANY IS A SNOOD BITCH! I SWEAR!

Atea Diosa: OH OH OH YOU CHEAT
Atea Diosa: damn snood

do you dare addict yourself?! SNOOD ON!!

kat09987:Anyways, that gave me an idea for the CLUE extra credit thing....we could go tou lots of diff. movie places [dressed up really really weirdly] and hang outs in diff parts of town and see how the reactions differ
aLittleStarlight:ghaha what would that do
kat09987:I guess it would be a bit ..... I dunno... steryotypical,
kat09987:It would be extrememly interesting
aLittleStarlight:yeah it would
aLittleStarlight:and then we would get shot
aLittleStarlight:the end
kat09987:It would be so cool...

;_; brittany has made me REALLY paranoid about christmas. fuck fuck it's not even THANKSGIVING yet. BRITTANY THIS IS ALL YOUR DAMN FAULT.

jezebellekilara:john [boyfriend] looks like joe dirt
jezebellekilara:i still love his chest and his tattooes
jezebellekilara:but oh well
jezebellekilara:not a basis for a relationship exactly
jezebellekilara:unless you're REALLY shallow
jezebellekilara:and i was aiming for that

i think reblogger died again ;_;

A mere Statistic:I wish I talked like r2d2
aLittleStarlight:beep beep
A mere Statistic:and that some big yellow robot always understood me
A mere Statistic:I could me like "beep beep et oh et oh et et oh"
A mere Statistic:big yellow robot: "take that back!"

BE MYSELF GONNA GET IN YOUR WAY BE MYSELF YOURE THE ONE....
YOURE THE ONE LAST ONE....

;_; i want a kill rock stars gift pack for christmas

aghahga it would seem that yesterday nick spent his spare time taking all the damn test thingies. he cracks me up. dont you love him.

i just rememberd that in my dream i went to a radiohead concert

aahaah i just took the blogaholic quiz again and somehow managed to get 48% instead of 32... x_x have i changed so much in the past few days? or did i just learn what a meme was? hmm....

it would seem as though i am staying home again today.

ok it's called "Vidrar Vel" and it's by this icelandic band and good lord it is beautiful please go watch the video at mtv.com

my god i just saw the saddest/sweetest/beautifullest music video of all time. it was by sigur ros but i dont know the title.. it had a v in it. GOOD LORD I LOVED IT. if anyone knows what it was please attack me... ;_; i could cry

 
gahsdhaha what the hell sdhglaskdhglas

HAHAHA i rule

Take the Affliction Test Today!
well who is REALLY surprised.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Moderate
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	Very High
Antisocial:	Moderate
Borderline:	Moderate
Histrionic:	Low
Narcissistic:	Low
Avoidant:	High
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Click Here To Take The Test --

I HAVE HUGE PERSONALITY FLAWS!

I AM 32% GEEK.

I probably work in computers, or a history
deptartment at a college. I never really
fit in with the "normal" crowd. But I have
friends, and this is a good thing.

Take the GEEK Test at Fuali.com!

I am 52% ADDICTED TO THE INTERNET.



I am pretty addicted, but there is hope. I think I'm just well connected to the internet and technology, but it's really a start of a drug-like addiction. I must act now! Unplug this computer!


Take the INTERNET-ADDICT Test at Fuali.com!

I AM 40% GOTH.

Goth by night, normal by day. Deep in my
heart I know I am evil, but not on the
company's time. I do need to eat.

Take the GOTH Test at Fuali.com!

I am 63% Grunge.

I am pretty dirty, all right and, I reek of teen spirit... I would sell my own children for a moldy hotpocket, man. Take the Grunge Test at Fuali.com!

today, brittany and bly and i are staying home from school.

A mere Statistic:my hair is all bed headed
aLittleStarlight:aaghaha
aLittleStarlight:mine is too
A mere Statistic:*feel feel*
A mere Statistic:so it is

jezebellekilara:stuff
jezebellekilara:stuff is dumb
aLittleStarlight:it sure is
aLittleStarlight:lets eat it
jezebellekilara:lol
jezebellekilara:yum
aLittleStarlight:now that is some good eatin

my cousin rita had her second baby today. they named her cassandra

my my i'm only a 32% blogaholic

Atea Diosa: DID YOU POST ON MY BLOG?!
aLittleStarlight: ....
aLittleStarlight: what
aLittleStarlight: no
aLittleStarlight: O.o
aLittleStarlight: i dont think so
aLittleStarlight: no
aLittleStarlight: what
aLittleStarlight: no
Atea Diosa: I POSTED THAT!??!?!
aLittleStarlight: YES LAHAHAHAHA
Atea Diosa: x_X
Atea Diosa: LOL WTF

Atea Diosa: your dirty words come out clean
A mere Statistic: damnit I'm talking to lana about social and innate morality, and how it affects sexual morality and whatnot
Atea Diosa: lol what
Atea Diosa: it was just in a song
Atea Diosa: shut up
Atea Diosa: i am the master at shoving many candy wrappers into a tiny milk dud box
Atea Diosa: <---master
A mere Statistic: ok
A mere Statistic: ::throws trix at you::

Atea Diosa:"and when it comes it comes abrupt it feels like trading brains with an imbisle"
aLittleStarlight:what the fuck
Atea Diosa:what the fuck

Ladygodiva76: dude we're so buying britt the new magnum XL XL trojan condoms - ok?

lana: oh you've gotta read the laylee quotes emote deleted my account
morgan: i posted on doy really stupid did you see it HA HA HA this is really stupid
brit: no
morgan: stp=afij I CAN'T KEEP UP
SHHHH
brit: X_X
mom: hey has anyone seen my terry pratchet book
alanna: i think it might be in the umm in the den?
morgan: hey alanna hey allana i'm aligator man*ramble* bumped into a tree swamp monster trying to drown her and i didn't know dingos lived in this part of george your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of eldeberiries(oops)
alanna: SCROLL DoWN ! YOU SPELLED MY NAME WRONG EVERYBODY TALK ABOUT POP MUSIC
*leave* Its A COMMERCIAL MOM
BRITT: Triest ot type
alanna: everybody talk about i know the trouble with the *something* grail is a bfat bastard
SCROLL DOWN
HA HA HA
alanna: *makes fun of rbrit typing *
tv: *scary music*
mom: LOOK ALANNA ITS ON
brt: o.o *pulbish*

Laylee2000: im going to eat my leg
Laylee2000: mmmmmm yummy knee....

aLittleStarlight: shh i'm putting you on my blog
Laylee2000: HAHAHAHAHAH
Laylee2000: yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Laylee2000: i love when u put me on there
Laylee2000: i go WOOWOO LOOK THATS MEEEEE !! and point to it like theres someone else here to see me pointing :)
Laylee2000: only i dont actually do thta....hahah

Laylee2000: omg i was offered a bar of chocolate last night by kyle and i was liek no i dont like solid chocolate
Laylee2000: and he was like? ok
Laylee2000: and i was like HAHA if id taken it, i woulda been a chocoalte whore
Laylee2000: IMA CHOCOLATE WHORE CHOCOLATE WHORE CHOCOLATECHOCOLATECHOCOLATE WHORE WHORE WHORE!!!
Laylee2000: haaaaaaahaaaaaa it was funn
Laylee2000: na dhe was like....whta the fuck!? hahahaha

Laylee2000: i thin kmy brothers really cool so its cool that hes [kyle] remotely like my brother in the "im not a preppy boy and im all cool n shit and i like all this cool music and im cool n shit" way
Laylee2000: ahahhahah thzt was fucked up

Laylee2000:but arg i think i shaved myt legs for nothing
Laylee2000:this is so annoying

ok it would seem that emote has deleted my account. emote is the place that lets me upload all my pictures and whatnot which is why everything is dead. also they will not let me make a new account, so for the time being everything is dead. sorry. give me a minute. blogs were supposed to be simple. i hate web sites.

my mother is insane.
mom: somebody saw my purse. somebody stole it. named alanna.

but. good lord. i think emote deleted my account. that is very sad. where am i going to put everything?!

A mere Statistic:I mean when I was little kid I became convinced that I could put headaches in socks

A mere Statistic:jesus christ on a cracker

hoy bofe:do you ever sleep

aLittleStarlight:that fellow frightens me
A mere Statistic:as he does me
aLittleStarlight:and his VOICE just KILLS MY SOUL
A mere Statistic:but
A mere Statistic:but
A mere Statistic:I love him

aLittleStarlight:my mother turns into a pumpkin at 11
A mere Statistic:well that's creepy

aww blogger is dyign

yay i am SO staying home from school!! and i almost slept through the whole damn thing too. we had a half day you know.

i love you, mr. bofe

now i am having archiving troubles.

the pet cd is very good.

i think the colors look funny over on the right side of the page. what do you think. i think they do.

i bought the pet cd today.

yay. many thanks to brittany AND bofe. you have healed mine bloggie.

this is beginning to kill me.

i agree with bly: blogger is pmsing.
this better not be fucking permanent!
i should file a complaint.

OK THIS IS NOT MY FAULT

good lord i broke the page

brittany, stay home on friday.

good lord x_x....

anyway liz phair was chosen for this layout because in the song 'supernova' she sings 'cuz youre a human supernova, a solar superman, you're an angel WITH WINGS OF FIRE, a giant flying friction blast' and i didnt know that at the time of the creation of this site.. yes indeed. so uhm. i'm about to go heal the little current side thing. yeah. uhm. ok.

Look i'm alanna *Giggle giggle*

laylee on halloween::: i was  a WHORE at aschool, and iw as the only one!!!!!!!!!

it seems as though brittany has just made a feeble attempt to speak at me. she doesnt even really know why i'm upset and i really don't think she's going to figure it out. morgan said she doesnt think the friendship is going to hold out much longer.

i am mad at brittany. i wonder if anyone could tell.

my grandfather, Henry Orville Stewart, 86, has suffered a mild heart attack. and he's ok. and he's in great health, considering he hasn't been to the hospital since 1970. last year granny had a little heart trouble as well and dad thinks grandaddy is going to have another heart attack also... they are keeping him in the hospital again tonight. he's going to be fine for now.

yesterday, as i hope you know, was morgan's birthday. we went to see monsters, inc and then we went to embassy suites and spent the night. it were good times indeed. monsters inc was cute and all and i may have liked it more than shrek. too early to tell. but i dont think it will win the oscar or anything. at embassy suites we road the elevator and looked at the fishies and marvelled at our room. then morgan opened her presents and we went swimming for a while till we reeked of chlorine and were wrinkly like many prunes. we then watched part of miss congeniality in the room (good lord i am sick of that movie) and mom ordered lovely room service pizza. and i drank mug root beer. and it was good. so uhm it came eventually and we ordered moulin rouge on the hotel tv. i liked it way more than i thought i would. waaayyyy more. it was very very good. its sad that they made such a big deal out of that fucking awful song. morgan said someone should have remade 'your song' (early elton john rules) and i think that would have done quite nicely if they'd gotten the right person to do it. or.. another song.
POINT: that song that did get done was godawful.
another point was that i really liked that movie. amazing. maybe my family will buy it later. they seemed to really enjoy it.
i wonder what that guy directed besides romeo and juilet. which is lovely. and the filming was just like that, everyone being all up close and people running around all fast. and the guy who played tybalt or whoever was in there as a midget and he was my favorite. good god he was funny. i love funny little people such as that.
POINT: go see it.
i can't believe i didnt see it earlier. christen saw it five times in the theatre.
so anyway. i was QUITE tired and thereby fell asleep. oh and morgan's cake was very good. from baskin robins. a beautiful thing. mint chocolate chip ice cream pie type thing with a chocolate crust and lots and lots of whipped cream all over everywhere. mmmm and whatnot.
look i have run away with myself again! the point was that uhm. where was i. oh yeah. the next morning morgan freaking woke me up while she was trying to get the damned yet LOCKED door to our room open and failing miserably. she did not notice that the little slidie thingie was all in place and LOCKED and whatnot. so i was like 'THE LITTLE THING IS IN' and she was like 'whaaat' and i died and she died and we all died and then she got it eventually and ran around on the balcony for a while and looked at everyone eating breakfast and then she came back in and dad and mom eventually got up and we had breakfast. mine was scrambled eggs and two pieces of bacon and two glasses of apple juice. i think there was a cheerleading competition or somethin because they were all there. and uhm. yes. indeed. so then we went swimming for only a little while and we left and yeah. so we didnt really do much else.

Ladygodiva76:remember elizabeth rosen??
aLittleStarlight:yeah
Ladygodiva76:apparently she used to carpool w/kyle when he was in 6th grade
Ladygodiva76:she was there last night, and we were talking
Ladygodiva76:and she said kyle used to think he was a VAMPIRE
Ladygodiva76:and hed go around sucking on anyone who had a papercut
Ladygodiva76:i laughed my ass off ALL FREAKIN NIGHTT bout that
aLittleStarlight:good lord
aLittleStarlight:thats fucking hilraious

happy birthday morgan

aLittleStarlight:*sneeze sneeze*
A mere Statistic:::sneezed on::
A mere Statistic:isn't that sexy

A mere Statistic:I respect all women bhahhaha what the hell ever happened to jas anyway

Laylee2000:i taste heavily of brandy
Laylee2000:hheeehhheeee

Laylee2000:we had to drive past hunter thompsons house to get home-- remember the party was tonight? haha i saw a ton of people outside and i went OH LOOK PEOPLE! and hallie started laughing her ass off because everythign isaid she took it as LAYLEEDS DRUN KOFF HER ASS!!!!

Laylee2000:IT WONT FUCKING UNSCREW
Laylee2000:YOU DO YOU KNOW HOW FUCKIGN ANNOYING THIS IS?!!!!!!!!!
Laylee2000:OHHHH MY GOD
Laylee2000:ARRRG IM GOING TO TAKE A HACKSAW TO THIS TIHN

i am fucking pissed off

Laylee2000:brittany is possibly the coolest person ever created
Laylee2000:POSSIBLY< well find out in a second if she is or not
Laylee2000:ahhahaha
aLittleStarlight:aww
aLittleStarlight:i've been ditched
aLittleStarlight:!!!!
Laylee2000:aw
Laylee2000:no youre pretty damn cool too

aLittleStarlight:i think we need to go resurrect lindenwood
aLittleStarlight:what do you think
hersheys086:what does ressurect mean?
hersheys086:haha

Laylee2000: heh heh heh heh hehe
Laylee2000: im reading ur first blog
Laylee2000: and the [infamous] IM that was w/u and nick about the roach
Laylee2000: i wish my mic worked so u coudl hear how im laughign
Laylee2000: hah hah haah

Laylee2000: ohs hutu
Laylee2000: :)
Laylee2000: i lvoe you alanan

yesterday morning, as i was waking up, i had this sort-of half-asleep 'dream' where botticelli's venus told me to go shave my legs.

Laylee2000:A;SLKJFD;LSAKFDJ
Laylee2000:you remember Lusty Laylee?
aLittleStarlight:x_x
Laylee2000:ii usd that today
aLittleStarlight:no...
Laylee2000:someone said i was a porn star

DAMMIT BORDERS IS BITCHLAND I HATE THEM YOU ASK FOR A SIMPLE LITTLE ORDER PLACEMENT OF THIS BOOK THATS NO WHERE ELSE IN TOWN BUT YOU JUST SAW IT THIS SUMMER AT THE DAMN PUBLISHING HOUSE AND YOU KNOW ITS STILL IN FUCKING PRINT EXCEPT THAT BORDERS/BITCHLAND AND IT TAKES THEM SIX DAMN WEEKS TO TELL YOU THAT ITS NO LONGER BEING PUBLISHED.

i had a good day today.
as it is, at this moment, i can't remember what was so good about it. but!! i do remember at one point in the day stopping all my wacky fun and saying 'this is a good day.'
so.
i remember that there was something about an erotic dance though.

aLittleStarlight:morgan is making fun of me
A mere Statistic:why
A mere Statistic:that meanie
aLittleStarlight:because i'm easy to make fun of
A mere Statistic:shh yeah well

I AM EATING COUNT CHOCULA.
I LOVE COUNT CHOCULA.

i forgot to blog on tuesday that this came out. yes indeed i want it. i also want the cranberries new album, 'wake up and smell the coffee' (that phrase eternally reminds me of mrs. moore. i love you, mrs. moore!!) i am talking to nick right now and he's lovely as usual but his computer is still broken and that is very crappy. (i love you, sir nicholas!!) and uhm. not much is happening. i finished my homework. dad signed my progress report. things are happening. why am i so hungry. nick makes me hungry. it's all his fault. it's always his fault. i asked mom to buy some boo berry or count chocula, since there is apparently a revival and brittany and i ate them at her house last weekend. dad denies having ever bought it in the first place but i swear he did!!! i think i have to publish the archives and heal them and uhm. i'm gonna go now.

Atea Diosa:i have no caffine in my system thats horrble
aLittleStarlight:awww
aLittleStarlight:that is horrible
aLittleStarlight:and here we are with a million six packs of diet drinks
Atea Diosa:i'm so out of it i just poked myself in the eye with toiletpaper

Atea Diosa:i kinda feel like being productive and making websites and just working my ass off tonight
Atea Diosa:brb i gotta pee

do you know how entertaining watching a washing machine can be?
i kept looking up to check it, so as to know when to put the detergent in and see if it was done and so on and so forth... and then i couldnt look back down.
suds are amazing creatures.

morgan and i had to hang out at the laundromat today because it was required in the chores or else i couldnt have brittany over. as things go, brittany didnt want to come over anyway so basically all that happened was that i got a little reading done.

last night the family and i went to davis-kidd for dinner and uhm. a bookie. 0r something. but the point is that i skipped the football game so i didnt have to march about and smash the cymbals. i met someone AGAIN. it seems that everyone was there, as they were having a 20% off sale. this girl... i dont remember how to spell her name.... rikelle??? x_x no idea. the point is that she and her friend were talking and i was looking at books and she was very familiar and she asked me if she knew me and i looked very familiar and i said yeah so do you and did you go to lindenwood? and yeah and she goes to IC also and she told me that the girl, shelia, whom i met on sunday, is not a very nice person even though she still does have good taste in books. so i had. i cant remember. food. at bronte. yes. so uhm. i ended up buying witches and wizards of oberin and black mirror and the hanged man and put me in a deliriously good mood!!! oh and we also got SECRET birthday presents for morgan and i cant tell you what they are yet because its TOTALLY SECRET!!! right-o so i read witches&wizards last night, since its a picture book and all it didnt take so long. i liked it more than i thought i would.

p.s. go email morgan and wish her a happy birthday. i promise i wont let her see it until next saturday, november 3, birthday of a genius.

aLittleStarlight:i'm eating a biscuit
aLittleStarlight:it tastes funny
hoy bofe:maybe you should cook it

do you remember dan from the 'ecstatic disco nights' play thing? i jolly well hope you do because he has come up again. he and christen foehring, who drives me to school every day, are in this christian youth choir thingie which got a new director a couple weeks ago, like right after the play ended. and this new evil choir director woman kicked him out of the choir because he's gay.
i hate people. especially memphians. we really, truly suck. if ever you meet a memphian, run away. as a matter of fact, if you meet any southerner, run away.
the point is that christen and her choir buddies organized this big whole thing with petitions and things and if they dont let him back in the choir, they're gonna drop out. more development on this later, if i remember to ask christen.

I SURE DO LOVE DELUDED PRINCESS OH MY GOD AND THEYRE SUCH HOT ASS PUNKS YOU KNOW THEY ARE AND THEIR SCREECHING WAILING MUSIC IS THE MOST INSPIRATIONAL SHIT I HAVE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE OH MY GOD I GOT KICKED OUT OF NEW DAISY THEATRE FOR ALL FUCKING ETERNITY BECAUSE I ATTACKED THE BAND DONT THEY KNOW WHAT GRATITUTE IS...... ????? PLEASE HELP ME SNEAK IN I LOVE THEM I DONT KNOW IF I CAN STAND IT IF I GO ANOTHER .6769234086 SECONDS WITHOUT HEARING THEM OH MY GOD

the new cranberries album came out two days ago. i want it.

aLittleStarlight:she was wearing a switchblade symphony shirt
Atea Diosa:yes she was
aLittleStarlight:that says a lot about a person
aLittleStarlight:besdies that they look like the potato famine

once upon a time i was at borders and this girl picked up troy by adele geras and i says to her i says 'thats a really great author' and she looked at me kinda funny and read the blurb and put it back and i was like, in my head anyway, 'your loss!' but i tried again on sunday there was another girl in the YA section at borders standing in the exact same spot, holding into the cold fire by lynne ewing and she picked up on the bright side i'm now the girlfriend of a sex god by louise rennison and anyway so i says to this girl i says 'thats a really funny author' and she actually SAID something, and as it just so happens, i can't remember what it was so i told her that it was the sequel and she goes 'yeah something about.... thongs?' and i went 'yes thats the one!' or something dumber but then we sort of turned back to our own respective shelves and she asked me a few moments later if i had read any klause and i went yes! yes! and we talked about her for a minute but she hasnt read alien secrets and then we walked around and i recommended things and she pointed out things and i went 'oh i've read that' repeatedly and we actually ended up talking about daughters of the moon for a few moments too. then on display there was a little sign that said something like... 'with a twist of the supernatural' and shattered mirror by amelia atwater-rhodes and echo by francesca lia block and witches and wizards of oberin by suza scalora were on display which REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY bothered me. a whole fucking lot. i cannot express how much that bothered me. go read the books, theyre all really short and suza scalora's are all photography books, so seriously just go read them and then tell me if that display name does not seriously bother you as well. anyway. the girl, shelia was her name, told me she had actually been looking for suza scalora's first book the fairies which is mighty good and brittany says she likes the pictures in that one better than the new one, but as i have only examined the new one once, and flipped through it on another occasion, i really can't tell yet. so as it wasnt with the new scalora books, which are in the YA section(?!?!?!) we looked in the picture books and couldnt find it so i would have suggested sci-fi/fantasy but her mother came and whisked her away. but it was nice to recommend things to people even if they wont remember. and even if they do go to IC.

Atea Diosa:you remember the pad i put in laylees note
Atea Diosa:turns out she NEEDED IT.
Atea Diosa:o.o

Laylee2000:omg my brother wsa in here helping me a minute ago and omg!
Laylee2000:he was like talking about these paintings and then out of the blue he goes have you ever smoked pot?
Laylee2000:an di was like *b=smile smily* no
aLittleStarlight:brittany says your brother is a drug dealer
Laylee2000:HES NOT A FUCKING DRUG DEALER
aLittleStarlight:SUUUUUUURE
Laylee2000:i hate nothign more than when people talk about my fucking brother
aLittleStarlight:whyd he ask you taht
Laylee2000:beacuse
Laylee2000:and then he was like kyle does
Laylee2000:and i was like yeah i know
Laylee2000:and yeah
Laylee2000:and then he was like so do i
Laylee2000:and i was lieK YEAH I KNOW!
Laylee2000:hahahahah
Laylee2000:it was really funny
aLittleStarlight:yes it was
Laylee2000:and then he was like all uhmmm haws kyle ever tried to get u to try it? or asked if you wanted to?
Laylee2000:and i waslike no not really he said i was too young
Laylee2000:and then he was lek what you WAnt to?! and i was liek no
Laylee2000:it was hiarious
Laylee2000:and WRONG
Laylee2000:lol!
Laylee2000:i hope to god u go blog and mention me

why is doy dead. i'm hungry. i am going to go and study for latin/read wuthering heights/fail everything anyway.
wish me luck or something.

i keep laughing randomly for no reason today.
i like it.

i am far too hungry.

i am home from school again. i'm supposed to be working on this book report that's due tomorrow. i'm gonna go listen to tori now.

Love Song For the Drummer by Dot Antoniades

He was chocolatemahoganybrownbrickred
several shades of Indian earth blended
no lines
creaseless
Symmetry danced in his veins
my inner sonata silenced
I became 1 movement
fluid
blushing beige at the thought of him in his boyhood
palms down
panting the vulnerability out of me
vulgar ability I have
to fantasize myself into his country
without knowing anything except
percussion turns me on
But it wasn’t about him
it was the song
La musica beating me ceaseless
senseless

I am young
so young
yet
have old eyes
a stolen soul
I steal souls
but viscerally speaking
my tummy doesn’t tumblesaul when I see him
But when I hear him
my spirit sambas uncontrollably
as if La Mariachi
were plucking steel
string
sinews inside me
Barely breathing
percussion rushing thru me
I could see nothing
I was surrounded by sound
panties stained a deeper shade of clay
as the rhythm made its home between my legs
hatching sunsets
a warmth only I was aware of

His spirit:  soft blunted blade
entering through my exit
I thought I had been spade
reinvented manmade
Music
I want you to lay
in the soft shell cave of my thighs
fill the echoes
make me come legato
because my poems have been plosive
too macho
Raise me 12 notes higher
sweaty palms ride me bareback
give phoenix her flames back
fan the silent valley under her wings
let her sing
until they cut out her tongue
or
the nightingale gets jealous
Wake Calliope
There’s salsa on the glossy cedar dance floor
now that I’ve drank the last drop I want more

I want to know
how bodies moved
in the first shadow of night
before the lights came on
and we saw
and were shamed
cos we felt so good
for our own sake
I want musica keeping my shoulders strong
womb thumping birth of bass
immaculate
no blueprint
to the submission into mass movement
I do not want to merely reflect
He was musician
I was nothing but me listening
trying to tear the atmosphere desperately
because gravity distracts me
keeps me from myself
I swore his eyes were not jewels.
They were dark
rich like chocolate
bigger than Guatemala
They knew things I wanted to know

That night I believed
I believed
Religion escaped me
faith became me
Alone
I dropped to my knees
humbled
and samba’d myself to sleep


© 1999 Dot Antoniades.

i am home sick today. yes indeed i am. i dont feel very good and i should be reading 'wuthering heights' right now but i am really really not in the mood. i should maybe eat something. my fingers are cold. i was making a patti smith tape for brittany and i intended to finish but mom put all the records someplace i dont know. so i found a lene lovitch record and listened to a couple of her songs because mom is always saying that she sounds like people i listen to today even though the album came out in 79 and i discovered shes the one who sings 'i think we're alone now'
btw the picture is of kim gordon from sonic youth. if its the purple one with the quote about joni mitchell i suggest you refresh the page because i like the red and orange ones better.
p.s. i added two new mp3s yesterday but be careful because sometimes they do not like to cooperate.

put rockstar shut-me-ups on your own page!

except not really because she's not dead!! again, the point of this quiz was really dumb but i liked taking it just because i did. and morgan and brittany got her too. so we were ALL this woman who is not dead yet.
after you take the test, it says:: "You were Adalita Srsen in a past life! Music is in your blood and you love nothing more than to be onstage in a small club with an appreciative crowd pumping out music in true punk-rock style. You love supporting causes you feel strongly about, which reflects in your songwriting. You also have a huge soft spot for our furry friends!"
about adalita it says:: "Being the female guitarist, lyricist and sultry lead singer in Australian band Magic Dirt, has elevated Adalita (her last name was Srsen but she has dropped it) to cult status within Australia.Magic Dirt were formed in Geelong, Victoria in 1992. ....live shows saw Adalita belting out riffs on the guitar with passion and intensity. In 1995 Magic Dirt supported Hole at some of the shows during their Australian tour, which gained the band more popularity. In 2001 Magic Dirt are touring to promote their new album "What Are Rockstars Doing Today?" Aside from being a great guitarist and a role model for guitar-playing girls all over Australia, Adalita is also a strong supporter of animal rights and is a member of the World Society of the Protection of Animals. She has also been involved in petitions against animal cruelty."
and the point is that magic dirt is a very cool band according to brittany.
i have not had the privilege of hearing them yet.

god damn. bloggerbot signed off again. well i dont blame it, with a warn of 96% and all. but it's highly annoying. so this weekend.
i guess no one knew but morgan and dad were in a play. actually i haven't had a chance to say anything about the plays they've been in, considering this is their first one of the season and the first one since my blog began. i don't really think i've taken the time to say ANYTHING about it which is really very rude of me. let me try to think of something important to say.
.......
once upon a time a year ago my sister and i were manually and brutally forced to attend this thing one saturday called COMMON GROUND. yes so there we met people. namely. zak (who i discovered goes to my school) and zoë (who i was paired up with when i wasnt allowed to pair with morgan because kimberly instructor lady knows us). yes so the point is i was terrified at the idea of COMMON GROUND, but morgan was very. not. right so i ceased showing up but she kept going. and then she got dad to go to the adult one. which i think he highly enjoyed. suddenly i can't remember much of what the actual COMMON GROUND play was like but thats ok for the moment i'm thinking. i remember that. khy said 'i am chocolate' and i liked that part. so they reeealllly liked doing it, my family did and i really liked watching them. i think i went to the show once or twice, and one time i sat with christen foehring and her friends next to a fellow named... Dan. (please remember that for later) the point is that it was a nice show and they really enjoyed it and so when it came time for auditions for the troupe's next show which was called 'ephemera' in which dad played a very important role, as the 'audience'. it was a play within a play so like he and sarah played the audience for this other play. and it was all the regulars. the troupe, our own voice. and i met all these wonderfully cool people in the troupe such as sarah, khy, john, sonja, alex, claire, melody, randy, chuck, bill, andy, bennett, oh my god the list goes on forever! so after 'common ground' and 'ephemera' there was... 'experimental movement' which is hte first one brittany saw. and then 'santa claus/spurt of blood' which was two different plays. and brittany helped me pass out programs on that one and the last day of it i had to watch the house which means taking up money and getting people drinks and programs and things. oh and somewhere along the line morgan and dad were made an official part of the troupe but not liek with a date or anything. suddenly they were just. in. and morgan told me all about everyone and it was really personal i think for me. almost like actually being in the show without the awkward acting bit. and then theres the dancing of course. which brings me round to the latest (first) show, of the new season, signifying morgan and dad's one year alliance with the company. indeed. so this show was a 'play' which is what everyone in the damn thing was calling it even though someone there described it as. uhm.... a 'disco musical.' there was no dialogue except for the small portion of dj talk between songs, written by randy who is mentally ill so it was amazingly cool sounding and only parts of it made sense. everyone had characters but we didnt really know much about them and we just had to make things up about them from their style of dancing and things. i think it really had to do with expression through dance of course. yeah so my dad and this guy john had characters based on steve martin and dan akryod's characters in some early snl episodes. you know. the czechoslovakian brothers. the two wild and crazy brothers. you remember them. i know you do. don't deny it. bitch. yeah so that was my dad and john. they were great. GREAT. and dad makes THE funniest faces whilst he dances. we cracked up through the whole damn thing. and these gay guys brad and dan were in it with zak as the uh. boy band. (justin, nick, and nigel) BOYS IN THE SINK!! alkhsdglkha they were hilarious and they had these great outrageous costumes. we screamed for them during their solo dance thingie. and saturday (last night) brittany made posters and we held them up and screamed and ohhh my god it was the best. morgan is the most adorable thing alive. i can't think of anything more to say and i'm very very very tired so goodnight all youse guys out there in blogland. or something.

alanna: *asks morgan an opinionated question*
morgan: *gives a random answer*
alanna: seriously?
morgan: no. i'm just guessing.

i'm now composing a post about the play. please be patient with me. it's in the process of being completed.

anyway where was i on the hair story. oh right. so uhm i was sitting there after my hair was done while mom got hers hacked away and i looked at these ancient hair style book thingies. you know the ones. unless they somehow only exist in memphis.
i have never gotten my hair cut out of town. amazing.
point being that there were many mullets

OH MY GOD I POSTED FROM BLOGGER BOT. THE DAMN FELLOW KEEPS SIGNING OFF

Atea Diosa:give it to me i love it i love it give it to me
Atea Diosa:o_o
aLittleStarlight:do you now

today i got my hair cut. it was raining, as mom loves get her hair cut on a rainy day. even though it doesnt look so nice for as long because you have to go into the rain when you leave. anyway.
the lady who did it was the same lady as last time. (last time= june 14, before we went to san francisco.) so the lady kept telling me that she couldnt believe my hair had grown so much. and then she kept telling me how thick it was and so on and so forth. she hums along to all the songs on the radio and she doesnt make me say much of anything and i like her. she didn't cut it as short as last time and i keep thinking that i look younger than i am.
the lady parted it on the side and put little pins up in it and made it twist around in some terrifying way to keep it out of my eyes. i dont do anything to it usually so after i take it out i dont intend to do anything like that to it again. we're going to peabody place for the first time later, and we're probably gonna see a movie (?)
i want to see if tower records has the new leona naess cd, seeing as no one else does.
i have never been to tower records before.
the point is.
that i will blog later. dad is being a bitch.

leona naess's new album came out yesterday. i didnt post about it then, though, because 1. i didn't really have the time and 2. i didnt even actually think about it and 3. amazon.com didnt even have the picture of the album cover up!
yes so that's quite sad.
i think that this album is gonna be much more poppy than her last one... morgan and i listened to a couple of the songs on her web site and i liked them but i get the feeling that it wont be as good. or maybe that's just because i bought garbage last week and it wasn't as good..... i don't know. bjork was wonderful wonderful so maybe this will be just as wonderful wonderful has her last album. which was truly wonderful wonderful. it's one of the only cds i own that could even be considered for classification under 'pop' even though it's not like.. radio pop i guess. not like sticky sugar-coated terrifying teenybopper pop. its just atmospherical pop. and quite lovely at that. and not all of the songs are even poppish i guess and the lyrics are beautiful. leona naess is a poet.
and i read somewhere that she's also a calvin klein model and that's why they put huge pictures of her face on her albums.
i also read that she refused to do a jeans ad wearing a bra like they wanted her to and instead she wore some huge men's shirt thing.
she's quite cool you know.

well THAT certainly took long enough.
ms. kitts: IT'LL ONLY TAKE THIRTY MINUTES
me: LKASD;GLH;SDhga;sldhg;lahd;gh;SDLHASK;LDG

ughhh i'm trying to do my homework and its really really really not going well..... *dies*

::::laylee on september 22 before we went bowling the other day::::
"kyle has a pond AND a pool. and theyre really pretty. sucha pretty house. what a bastard."

i feel that i am becoming influental musically again. on a very small scale.
i got katherine dohan to download 'all hands on the bad one' by sleater-kinney. *so go get it.* and then she asked me about buying a cd.
and this isnt as big, but i brought the new garbage cd in christen's car this morning when she drove me to school and i'm supposed to burn a copy for her, and i figure you know it can be a regular thing if i brought cds sometimes. and like. totally attack her. fun day! i want to bring s-k tomorrow now.
i listened to the first part of the garbage cd yesterday and i didnt like it very much but then i listened to some more of it, the middle/second half part of it and i liked it more. there were more classic garbage elements, which had been lacking in the first part. so then we listened to it in the car this morning and the beginning grew on me a bit even if it's not what you'd expect from them. i mean that IS the point and everything obviously but like... i mean.. musically. like the lyrics and the melodies weren't as good as the standards i've set for the band.

THIS PAGE IS HILARIOUS GHAHGAH you must go. its soooo funny in a really crappy way. brittany and i were uhm. 'discussing' it last night....

aLittleStarlight: http://www.gurlpages.com/contradictory/index.htm <- page that looks funny but is blinding me
Atea Diosa: hey sweet look at the little thingie at the bottom
Atea Diosa: *goes about reading rants*
aLittleStarlight: lol
aLittleStarlight: is it not blinding you
Atea Diosa: either they have really bad typing skills
Atea Diosa: or they have really bad grammar
Atea Diosa: and worse spelling than i
Atea Diosa: "this is why i think aborton shold bv etotaly made ilegal in every country of the world except mabe those realy bad countries were they suck and all. not like america which is obvously the best and most i,mpotant place to liv. "
Atea Diosa: O_O
Atea Diosa: my my...
Atea Diosa: i,mpotant alanna
Atea Diosa: *dies*
Atea Diosa: "ok i have had a totaly great udea, in all the cool countries were they make cool stuff and are realy imoptant in world afairs and have all provelegs and enligtend peple and stuf they shold make aborton ilegal. but in the sucky coutries were they all ignoant and dont do stuf like america aborton shold be reqired."
Atea Diosa: *Starts laughing*
aLittleStarlight: AHAAHAHAHA
aLittleStarlight: thats ahdgshadhalhkdasd funny
Atea Diosa: she didn't even state why she thinks it shoudl be illegal!
aLittleStarlight: yeah well
aLittleStarlight: i read the first poem and it was boring so i'm not gonna read any of the others
Atea Diosa: and her spelling/typing is driving me crazy
Atea Diosa: its worse than mine.
aLittleStarlight: maybe she just thinks that since she's so superior to everyone else that she should just automatically think differently and she shouldnt have to state her opinion. she's DIFFERENT. should'nt it be OBVIOUS?
Atea Diosa: "i am DEEPLY involved with anthing that has to do with being different cuz as you know, i am so different from anyone els in the world (you can see that in my poemss)). but homosexuality is like, so wrong. ill tell you"
aLittleStarlight: see that!!
Atea Diosa: *Bursts into laughter*
aLittleStarlight: alkdhgla;dhgaldkh
Atea Diosa: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
aLittleStarlight: *dies*
Atea Diosa: OMG *dies of laughter*
aLittleStarlight: x_x
aLittleStarlight: this is really getting on my nerves now
aLittleStarlight: *runs away*
Atea Diosa: omg i just read this thing to my parents
Atea Diosa: and this is just soooooo funny
Atea Diosa: my parents are making fun of her
aLittleStarlight: LOL
aLittleStarlight: read what thing
Atea Diosa: go read the "homosexuality" thing
Atea Diosa: "well as a femenist i have relised it is my RIGHT and privledge to war miniskirts and bras only if i want to! femenists are reclaming thereselves and we can wer anything we want (ok but dont do it if your really fat cos thats prety gross) we can be as sexual as we want anytime we want for anyone! we desrve to hav this right like men. if i went to bar and slept with evrry guy there that doesnt make me s lut but a womyn in control of hersef."
aLittleStarlight: "sexx if for MAKIN BABYS, k, its not for stickin your penis in someones......,.... i cant even say it, ewww.  and like, two women is even worsse because you know, i wouldnt ever touch a girl's..., youknow." shes talking about how great she is and she cant even say vagina. she cant even TYPE it.
aLittleStarlight: thats just sad
aLittleStarlight: SAD
Atea Diosa: omg
Atea Diosa: i'm so going to email this bitch and rave at her constantly
aLittleStarlight: "i mean hey, do whateverr (orr whoever HA HA HA)"
aLittleStarlight: and obviously she finds herself amusing
Atea Diosa: I KNOW I KNOOOOOOW read this
Atea Diosa: "if i went to bar and slept with evrry guy there that doesnt make me s lut but a womyn in control of hersef."
aLittleStarlight: X_X
Atea Diosa: "as a femenist i dont thinkwomyn shold have to suffer PERODS. this is disgutsing icky and smely and also it is rather barbaric to bled esp form the privates *blush* i think that all you doctos shold get together quick and make a drug that stop perods! it is so unladylike!"
aLittleStarlight: X_X
aLittleStarlight: yes and we're still supposed to all make children.
Atea Diosa: *falls over and dies*
Atea Diosa: *reapeatedly*
aLittleStarlight: and if thats not ladylike then what the hell is!??!
Atea Diosa: *bursts into laughter*
Atea Diosa: who the hell knows
aLittleStarlight: "why would yyou be gaay if your parents arent't?" 
aLittleStarlight: asdghashdgladkhgs;ldhgal sdhgaskdhg;lasdkhg;lakgh;sdalhg
aLittleStarlight: *rolls away*
Atea Diosa: omg *reads her poem*
Atea Diosa: *dies*
Atea Diosa: i wonder if this is a joke site
aLittleStarlight: "you know i would understnd if it wasn't a choice (YES it is a choice, deal with it, its a sickness that makes them chooose too be lke that)" i really dont think she gets it that people DONT chose to be like that
aLittleStarlight: and just because you dont get aids just by being gay
aLittleStarlight: "thee most emportant thingin thee world"
Atea Diosa: HAHHAHAHAHA MY PARENTS ARE SO DISSING HER
aLittleStarlight: ahshha what are they saying
Atea Diosa: *listenage*
aLittleStarlight: waht the hell did he say
Atea Diosa: he said
Atea Diosa: 'oh illusive intellegence where art thou"
aLittleStarlight: HAHHAHAHAHAH
aLittleStarlight: AHAHAAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
aLittleStarlight: AHAAHHAAAAHAAHHAHAHA
aLittleStarlight: akshasd;lkghak;lh
aLittleStarlight: "so its not like i hav, like, a problm with wat thei do, but yu know, do it in private, like in yor BEDS (eewwww)"
aLittleStarlight: WHAT THE HELL IS HER PROBLEM
aLittleStarlight: GEEZ
aLittleStarlight: SHES LIKE
Atea Diosa: theyre cracking me up
Atea Diosa: O_O she's a fucking insane
aLittleStarlight: 'NO I HAVE ABOSLUTELY NO PROBLEM WITH IT I AM SO OPEN EEWWWWWW GROSS GORSS'
aLittleStarlight: tell her shes a goddamn hypocrite
Atea Diosa: hahah
Atea Diosa: hahahaha i will
aLittleStarlight: "and the last thing-- AND THISS IS LIKE, A SCIENTFIFIC FACT!!!-- its those gayz who brouught aids to the world!"
aLittleStarlight: it was a chimpanze actually.
aLittleStarlight: some idiot in the jungle ate a funky chimpanze
aLittleStarlight: and started passing aids around
Atea Diosa: my parents are so making fun of her
aLittleStarlight: ahahghaha
aLittleStarlight: apparently
aLittleStarlight: what the hell are they saying
Atea Diosa: i'm sending it to you
aLittleStarlight: the best part is like
aLittleStarlight: how she says shes a pagan
aLittleStarlight: and she doesnt even know what that means
aLittleStarlight: i find it so hilarious
aLittleStarlight: shes like 'i havent read about it or anything but in my heart i know i'm a pagan'
aLittleStarlight: except with many more spelling mistakes
Atea Diosa: where did she say pagan
aLittleStarlight: uhm lemme see
Atea Diosa: go listen
aLittleStarlight: at the end of the gay thing
aLittleStarlight: and... in the bio part i think
aLittleStarlight: "i triedd to help themm but they didnt want help!"
aLittleStarlight: ^evil lady in 'but i'm a cheerleader' movie
Atea Diosa: LOLOLOL
Atea Diosa: thats my parents
aLittleStarlight: AHHAHAHAHAHA
aLittleStarlight: AAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH
aLittleStarlight: AHGHAHHASDHASKDLHAH
aLittleStarlight: AHAHHAHHGAHHAH
aLittleStarlight: SDHASDGLKHASHGKD;LAHDGHAHAHHAHAHAHH
Atea Diosa: LOLOLOLOL
Atea Diosa: isn't that the funniest shit ever
aLittleStarlight: HAHAHAAHGAHDSHHAD
aLittleStarlight: AHAHAHHAHHAHHAHHAAH
aLittleStarlight: ANGSTY
aLittleStarlight: omg britany
aLittleStarlight: I JUST REALISEX
aLittleStarlight: THE BAGE
aLittleStarlight: THE PAGE IS CLLA
aLittleStarlight: HASGDHAHHAHAGHA
aLittleStarlight: SDHAHAH THE APGE IS COLALED
aLittleStarlight: CONTRADICTION.ORG ASHDGSAD GLKADHHGAHH AHAHGHADSHA HSDGHAHSDHAA
Atea Diosa: HAHAHAHAHAH yeah
aLittleStarlight: GSDHAHAHHGAHHAHAHHAHAA
aLittleStarlight: HAHAHHAHHHAHAHAHHAHAHA
aLittleStarlight: SALKHDGA;DGKHADLKH
aLittleStarlight: ok i have to go now
Atea Diosa: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
aLittleStarlight: x_x
aLittleStarlight: ashgdhasdahha dhshdhahhh gahsdhahh gahahsdahhs
Atea Diosa: okokok
Atea Diosa: byesbyes
Atea Diosa: *dies of laughter*]
aLittleStarlight: your parents are hilarious
aLittleStarlight: angsty angsty
aLittleStarlight: bye

today the garbage album came out. i really want this and kristin hersh at the moment because this weekend i bought tuscadero's 'pink album' from 94 and ani difranco's debut album from 1990. it makes me happy.
so i'm going to try to get dad to take me to cd warehouse after school tomorrow because i KNOW they have kristin hersh which is impossibly great considering no one else does and they'll probably have garbage because they have some new albums and whatnot. did you know that shirley manson chopped all her hair off? i did not but she wason the cover of cosmogirl. just ask laylee. yeah so uhm. i just took this weird thing.

i liked reading the answer just because it was musicalness but i didnt like the whole boyfriend idea or anything. but whatever.
or maybe its just because thom yorke is like a thousand years older than me. ahahahh maybe not.
i'm going to run away now.
i'm talking to nick and laylee and katie, and brittany is talking to katie so it's lovely.
except that aj left.
he didn't even say goodbye to me either!

dirty boy.

the other day frankie and i were waiting for her mom to come pick us up and this car was at the red light stopped and whatnot and it was one of those little putt-putting cars. yeah you know the ones. except that it was like red and blue painted and there was this huge fake leanie-over can-shaped fiend on the back that said 'RED BULL' on it and then you realized the whole CAR said 'RED BULL' on it and there were these two people in it and they started waving drastically at us and frankie said they were holding red bull can things themselves but i didnt see that so we waved drastically back at them. and then i looked at frankie and we talked for like two seconds and then looked back out at the street and they were still there and they waved and we waved and it was rather amusing.
then frankie's mom was driving us home, and we passed starbucks and sitting there in the parking lot was the goddamn RED BULL car and i went LKAHSDGOIELKASHDLG and i fell into the window and practically out of the car.

Laylee2000: where are oyu you filthy skank whore??

Auto response from aLittleStarlight:
aLittleStarlight: buying tomatoes
Laylee2000: HAHAh

i had a terrible headache earlier at rite aid while i was buying a folder for my health project and then i came home and cleaned out the catboxes and started talking to nick and my headache went away. and then i talked to nick for forever and worked on my health report and after a while nick went away and my headache took the oppurtunity to come back. i finished the health thing... it was a report on manic-depressive disorder for your information. yeah and in a moment i'm gonna have to write a crappy poem for english class with only actions about "someone i admire" and i dont even know who that is yet. probably morgan becase she does so much. right now i am eating plain spaghetti noodles with nothing on them and i'm about to die but i want some ice cream.

laylee has the best way of saying swear. go ask her.

brittany needs to learn how to drive and i get to be in the car and listen to disney music and i am so special and laylee has the best laugh. i am a rapid cheetah.

laylee is going out with kyle and she's on the phone right now with me and she wants me to say so and that its rumored that he's a rapist or something and he wants to take her to rocky horror and he will dress her up as dr. frankenfurter and you know. and i'm supposed to go to wild oats and harass arman now