Saturday, December 18, 2004

i am good enough for someone

i was late to the yuletide extravaganza because i'm a mess, and i didn't find a real ride. so i bummed with mouse and morgan to the paradiso where they were seeing a movie and then walked to alice's house. i missed the entire concert part. i did get a couple bagel bites during the after party though. katherine drove me home. we blasted "killing in the name of" and looked hot and punk-ass in our formal wear. then we watched ashlee simpson music videos. what is life?
i figured i would post the rodent carols just for old time's sake. and by that, i mean i want to come back and laugh at them in a year.

to the tune of The Christmas Song, aka Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire
Hamsters singing in a rodent choir
I didn't know your mother sews
Yet on each paw, there's a glove made of straw
Cold hamsters... we are

Hamsters stacking up the Yule-logs higher
Or else we will soon be froze
The sticks are a-burnin', but soon we will be learnin'
Not to stand too close to a fire.

Hamsters toasting at an open fire
We feel danger coming close
Move out of the way or a price we will pay
AAAGHHHHHHH, oh no.

Hamsters roasting on a funeral pyre
We are feeling rather poached
Flames lick my fur as I turn to ember
I'm a goner....
I'm toast.


to the tune of O Little Town of Bethlehem
O little mouse of Bethlehem
Tempted by the brie
Satan's wish did lure you in
Under the Christmas tree

As you were getting closer,
You saw the darker side
You thought you ordered a soul mate
You got a mail order bride

O little mouse of Bethlehem
O so sadly decieved
The Christmas spirit is gone away
No longer in pine leaves

But before you turn to druid
You must look closer now
I see a sticky fluid
Flowing from evergreen boughs

O Hallelujah, Hallelujah
This tree is for real!
It's not plastic or operatic
It's not a Wal-Mart deal

Drawn by tree of knowledge
O you can have it all!
It smelled good from over here
But that was Eve's downfall

O little mouse of Bethlehem
You finally found the source
The cheese is now within your grasp
A fitting final course

THE TRAP IS SLOWING CLOSING
ENCROACHING ON YOUR TAIL
WHILE OTHER JUDGES MIGHT BE KIND
THIS TRIP WON'T ACCEPT BAIL
*SNAP!*

listening to: throwing muses - solar dip

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